Okay, it's a long one. I've done and had a lot of time to think about some things these last two weeks.
First of all, we had a family reunion - my husbands side - at the funeral of my father-in-law. He has one brother who is younger and a sister who is older. My husband is the middle child. I've been married almost 34 years and I have yet to figure how they ended up like they did. Maybe it's more usual than I think, but it wasn't like mine. Yes, mine was dysfunctional, but well maybe it was my dysfunction and I was used to it.
Anyway - my husband NEVER, unless it was regarding his father, my husband, his sister, and his brother, NEVER call each other. There is no relationship there at all. They aren't mad. They talk when they get together. There is never any arguing about anything. They are totally fair. I wonder now, with his father gone, if they will ever talk again? Or will it be when one of them dies, they will get together for the funeral, and then part again until the second one dies? I mean - what kind of relationship is that? I truly do not understand it.
We were in Chicago through Thanksgiving day. They both new that we were staying. No one invited us for Thanksgiving. It was really okay because we went to the Lincoln Park Zoo in the snow and had a great time, but I would NEVER let a family or a friend be alone for Thanksgiving hundreds of miles from home or one mile from home. I'd at least ask. If they said no, that would be okay, but I would ask. Now while my husband's family didn't ask, my dear friend in NC asked us to come with her. She had a full house already and said she'd put us up and she would have! When I got home I wrote an old friend from Chicago and she said if she knew we were there and alone she'd have had us over. I had a girlfriend here in Georgia ask us over too.
Now these these three friends meant it. They didn't say they would call me, they did call me. They would have put themselves out for me. They didn't make a promise and then break it. They didn't let the fact they had family already coming stop them. They were going to deny themselves, put themselves out, for me! That is a priceless gift.
Why are friends sometimes closer than family? In my life, my raising (which had it's problems), I was taught one thing, and I was taught it big time - LOYALTY. There is something to be said about loyalty, love, and family in my book.
Which brings me to an article I once read. I was telling an old friend about this awhile ago, but didn't remember how it went exactly - here it is:
Everyone Can't Be In Your Front Row!!!
Life is a theater so invite your audiences carefully.
Not everyone is holy enough and healthy enough to have a FRONT ROW seat in our lives.
There are some people in your life that need to be loved from a distance.
It's amazing what you can accomplish when you let go, or at least minimize your time with draining, negative, incompatible, not-going-anywhere relationships, friendships, fellowships and family!
Everyone Can't be in Your FRONT ROW.
Observe the relationships around you.
Pay attention to:
Which ones lift and which ones lean?
Which ones encourage and which ones discourage?
Which ones are on a path of growth uphill and which ones are just going downhill?
When you leave certain people, do you feel better or feel worse?
Which ones always have drama or don't really understand, know and appreciate you and the gift that lies within you?
Everyone Can't be in Your FRONT ROW.
The more you seek God and the things of God, the more you seek quality, the more you seek not just the hand of God but the face of God, the more you seek things honorable, the more you seek growth, peace of mind, love and truth around you, the easier it will become for you to decide who gets to sit in the FRONT ROW and who should be moved to the balcony of your life.
Everyone Can't be in Your FRONT ROW.
You cannot change the people around you...but you can change the people you are around!
Ask God for wisdom and discernment and choose wisely the people who sit in the FRONT ROW of your life.
Remember that FRONT ROW seats are for special and deserving people and those who sit in your FRONT ROW should be chosen carefully.
Everyone Can't be in Your FRONT ROW.
It's funny. The people who I have in my mind that should care about me - don't always care about me. It blows my mind. I'm not like that personally.
I have to remind myself to let it go, not be hurt or angry, and look at what I do have. So to keep up with the Thanksgiving spirit - I am sooooooooo thankful for my friends. I am so blessed.
I know who is in my front row and who is not.
Love,
a venting Chatty Crone
1 comment:
Chatty, thanks for sharing this...it is something to ponder.
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