"Life is lived forward, but understood backward. It is not until we are down the road and we stand on the mountain looking back through the valley that we can appreciate the terrain God has allowed us to scale.” Jill Savage

Tuesday, May 05, 2009

Will the Real Chatty Crone please stand up

Life is like a mirror. If you frown at it, it frowns back. If you smile at it, it returns the greeting.
- Herbert Samuels

My life seems to evolve around problems. Now dear Ms. Penniwig thinks I'm an eternal optimist.
"Girl you are relentlessly upbeat!!!"

I'm not so sure about that.

I wasn't always a person who tried to be positive. I had to force myself to start thinking that way.

I must be honest, it's very easy in my situation to think pessimistically.

This is the thing about me though. I see pessimism all around me. I see bitterness and I feel it. Lives gone sour. I don't want to be like that! I'm talking about real pessimism. Seems for now I can't do much about it - except for how I choose to react to it. And to be honest it's harder these days to stay positive, but I'm going to do everything within my power, for as long as I can, to stay positive - I feel better being positive than negative.

It's hard today especially because my dermatitis is flaring up from the dog and I know now, I have to be the one to give Scrappy - the dog away. I'm the bad guy having to take him from my grandson and daughter after her wedding was called off by the groom. You would think wouldn't you that they would care enough about me to let the dog go easier. However, I do understand how hard it is going to be on them. My question is do they see how hard it is on me?

The only reason I agreed to the dog in the first place was so that my grandson could have a pal for when he moved! He was so sad about leaving and I thought if he had this dog it would be easier. I knew I was allergic to dogs. The wedding was canceled, but I didn't do it. Yet I'm sure paying for this as if I did. It's like a morgue here. But it has to be done because I'm not going to get sick via a dog. Life is hard enough . . .

So I'm sad today and crying. I don't want to be where I am at - yet I am - so I'm going to CHOOSE to make the best of things. Writing my Blog, talking with friends, singing, dancing, music, words or wisdom, meditations, reading, going out somewhere - these things help me stay positive. That's why I do them. It's my choice.

I was getting a new phone yesterday at Verizon and heard this Bruce Springsteen song that I put below this. I immediately started feeling better and my insides just started dancing and some day before I die - I might even start dancing in places out of the blue for real (I said maybe)!

You can't start a fire sitting 'round crying over a broken heart.
This gun's for hire
Even if we're just dancing in the dark
You can't start a fire worrying about your little world falling apart
This gun's for hire
Even if we're just dancing in the dark
Even if we're just dancing in the dark
Even if we're just dancing in the dark
Even if we're just dancing in the dark

Chatty is dancing, in the dark - trying to smile into the mirror of life and be relentlessly upbeat.

10 comments:

Kristine said...

Hi Chatty!!!
saw your post with Ms Penniwig, and had to pop over and say HELLO!!!!
I'm from Atlanta!!!..Down south in Griffin to be exact!..LOL!!..
So couldn't pass ya like a stranger on the street without saying
"hope you have a wonderful day"!!!

Kristine ;-)

ClassyChassy said...

Hang in there - it will get better. I'm sure they do care about you and your health - but desire to keep the dog is blocking that right now. When they move out, they can live life like they decide to, but until then, it is still your house, your health, and your rules. Stay Strong!

ClassyChassy said...

...and don't forget to read your 'sign' - HONOR YOURSELF!

Chatty Crone said...

ClassyChassy-
Thanks I needed that!

^..^Corgidogmama said...

Keeping the dog is no problem....they'll just have to move out and live somewhere else, with the dog. You can't have it in YOUR house.
So...what do we learn from this?

Sigh...keep on dancing girl, if you stop...reality hits. That's not especially a good place to be.
Believe me...I'm in a 32 foot tin can with somebody I can't stand!

Chatty Crone said...

A mansion some times isn't big enough.

Wendy Whiner said...

Hi Chatty,
You are such a good writer and you have the ability to put your feelings into words - I can feel your pain. I am hurting for you right now. I think I'll try to dance too!
Wendy

Chatty Crone said...

Wouldn't it be fun to break the norm just once and dance?

Olde Dame Penniwig said...

All I can say is do yer best for the poor dog. If you find him a good home then you've done yer duty though yer daughter didn't do hers. Her behavior must be so disappointing.

Icewind said...

Hang in there!

Dogs come and go in our lives for various reasons.

Ice