For 2017

"Life is lived forward, but understood backward. It is not until we are down the road and we stand on the mountain looking back through the valley that we can appreciate the terrain God has allowed us to scale.” Jill Savage

Friday, September 11, 2009

The Fun Part of Friday . . .


Do you recognize these three fellows? It happens to us all.


A husband had just finished reading a new book entitled, 'YOU CAN BE THE MAN OF YOUR HOUSE'

He stormed into the kitchen and announced to his wife, 'From now on, you need to know that I am the man of this house and my word is Law. You will prepare me a gourmet meal tonight , and when I'm finished eating my meal, you will serve me a sumptuous dessert.

After dinner, you are going to go upstairs with me and we will have the kind of sex that I want.
Afterwards, you are going to draw me a bath so I can relax. You will wash my back and towel me dry and bring me my robe. Then you will massage my feet and hands. Then tomorrow, guess who's going to dress me and comb my hair?'

The wife replied, 'The funeral director would be my first guess.


ONE POTATO--TWO POTATO

Well, Girl Potato and Boy Potato had eyes for each other, and finally they got married, and had a little sweet potato, which they called 'Yam.'

Of course, they wanted the best for Yam.

When it was time, they told her about the facts of life.

They warned her about going out and getting half-baked, so she wouldn't get accidentally mashed, and get a bad name for herself like 'Hot Potato,' and end up with a bunch of Tater Tots.

Yam said not to worry, no Spud would get her into the sack and make a rotten potato out of her!

But on the other hand she wouldn't stay home and become a Couch Potato either.

She would get plenty of exercise so as not to be skinny like her Shoestring cousins.

When she went off to Europe, Mr. and Mrs. Potato told Yam to watch out for the hard-boiled guys from Ireland .

And the greasy guys from France called the French Fries.

And when she went out west, to watch out for the Indians so she wouldn't get scalloped.

Yam said she would stay on the straight and narrow and wouldn't associate with those high class Yukon Golds, or the ones from the other side of the tracks who advertise their trade on all the trucks that say, 'Frito Lay.'

Mr. and Mrs. Potato sent Yam to Idaho P.U. (that's Potato University ) so! that when she graduated she'd really be in the Chips.

But in spite of all they did for her, one-day Yam came home and announced she was going to marry Tom Brokaw.

Tom Brokaw!

Mr. and Mrs. Potato were very upset.

They told Yam she couldn't possibly marry Tom Brokaw because he's just.......

Are you ready for this?

Are you sure?

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OK! Here it is!

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A COMMON TATER






Dating in 1957 (excuse the language but it is kind of funny)

It's the summer of 1957 and Harold goes to pick up his date, Peggy Sue.
Harold's a pretty hip guy with his own car and a ducktail hairdo.
When he goes to the front door, Peggy Sue's mother answers and invites
him in. "Peggy Sue's not ready yet, so why don't you have a seat?"
Peggy Sue's mother asks Harold what they're planning to do. Harold
replies politely that they will probably just go to the malt shop or to a
drive-in movie.

Peggy Sue's mother responds, "Why don't you kids go out and screw? I
hear all the kids are doing it."

Naturally this comes as quite a surprise to Harold and he says, Whaaaat?"

"Yes," says Peggy Sue's mother, "We know Peggy Sue really likes to screw; why, she'd screw all night if we let her!"
Harold's eyes light up and he smiles from ear to ear. Immediately, he has revised the plans for the evening.

A few minutes later, Peggy Sue comes downstairs in her little poodle skirt with her saddle shoes, and announces that she's ready to go.

Almost with breathless anticipation, Harold escorts his date out the front door while Mom is saying, "Have a good evening kids," with a small wink for Harold.

About 20 minutes later, a thoroughly disheveled Peggy Sue rushes back into the house, slams the door behind her and screams at her mother: "Mom! It's the Twist! It's called The Twist!"


"I have found at my age that going braless pulls all the wrinkles out of my face."

Looking for my wallet and keys.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pJDNsJEnWqk&feature=email

Repeat after me ----------------




I WILL NOT ------------------------



complain -----------------------



about my job,---------------------------


Ever again!

Chatty

5 comments:

Changes in the wind said...

Oh Chatty...this last picture blew me away!!!

Wendy Whiner said...

I'm loving your postings today. You brought me lots of smiles.
Wendy

Chatty Crone said...

Changes in the Wind - hope it didn't 'blow' you too far (lol).

Wendy - I have missed you - I thought you gave up blogging!

Buttercup said...

You made me laugh, and yes, my job suddenly looks much, much better.

Chatty Crone said...

:)