For 2017

"Life is lived forward, but understood backward. It is not until we are down the road and we stand on the mountain looking back through the valley that we can appreciate the terrain God has allowed us to scale.” Jill Savage

Friday, October 16, 2009

Fun Friday - Take a laugh break . . .



Below are four (4) questions and a Bonus question to test your perception, reasoning and the quickness of your logical processing.
They are stated simply so you should try to answer them instantly.
To assure the accuracy of the results, you should not take your time , but instead, answer each of them immediately.

Let's find out just how clever you really are....

Ready? GO!!!

First Question:

You are a participant in a race. You overtake the second person. What position are you in?

Answer : If you answered that you are first, then you are absolutely WRONG! If you overtake the second person and you take his place, YOU are in second place!
Try not to screw up next time. Now answer the second question, but don't take as much time as you took for the first question, OK?

Second Question:

If you overtake the last person, then you are...?

Answer : If you answered that you are second to last, then you are WRONG again. Tell me Sunshine, how can you overtake the LAST person??

Third Question:

Very tricky arithmetic! Note: This must be done in your head only. Do NOT use paper and pencil or a calculator. Try it.

Take 1000 and add 40 to it. Now add another 1000 Now add 30 . Add another 1000 . Now add 20 . Now add another 1000 . Now add 10 . What is the total?

Did you get 5000 ?

The correct answer is actually 4100. If you don't believe it, check it with a calculator! Today is definitely not your day, is it ?

Maybe you'll get the last question right... .

Fourth Question:

Mary's father has five daughters: 1. Nana, 2.. Nene, 3. Nini, 4. Nono, and ??? What is the name of the fifth daughter?

Did you Answer Nunu? NO! Of course it isn't.
Her name is Mary! Read the question again!

Okay, now the Bonus round,I.e., a final chance to Redeem yourself:

A mute person goes into a shop and wants to buy a toothbrush. By imitating the action of brushing his teeth he successfully expresses himself to the shopkeeper and the purchase is done. Next, a blind man comes into the shop who wants to buy a pair of sunglasses; how does HE indicate what he wants?

It's really very simple He opens his mouth and ask for it!



A teacher noticed that a little boy at the back of the class was squirming around, scratching his crotch, and not paying attention. She went back to find out what was going on. He was quite embarrassed and whispered that he had just recently been circumcised and he was quite itchy.

The teacher told him to go down to the Principal's office. He was to telephone his mother and ask her what he should do about it. He did it and returned to his class. Suddenly, there was a commotion at the back of the room She went back to investigate only to find him sitting at his desk with his penis hanging out.

'I thought I told you to call your mom!' she said. 'I did,' he said, 'And she told me that if I could stick it out till noon, she'd come and pick me up from school.'

KIDS; DON'T YOU JUST LOVE 'EM!






What do you get when you mix PMS with a GPS? A crazy nut who will find you!






LETTER OF RECOMMENDATION

1 Trevor Adams, my assistant programmer, can always be found
2 hard at work in his cubicle. Trevor works independently, without
3 wasting company time talking to colleagues. Trevor never
4 thinks twice about assisting fellow employees, and he always
5 finishes given assignments on time. Often he takes extended
6 measures to complete his work, sometimes skipping coffee
7 breaks. Trevor is a dedicated individual who has absolutely no
8 vanity in spite of his high accomplishments and profound
9 knowledge in his field. I firmly believe that Trevor can be
10 classed as a high-calibre employee, the type that cannot be
11 dispensed with. Consequently, I truly recommend that Trevor be
12 promoted to executive management, and a proposal will be
13 executed as soon as possible.

Addendum
The idiot was standing over my shoulder while I wrote this report.
Kindly re-read only the odd numbered lines.



Happy Birthday to Angela Lansbury - Can you say Murder She Wrote - I loved that show and I think she's a great role model.

Born in England and following her father's death from stomach cancer, her mother became involved with a Scotsman named Leckie Forbes a former colonel with the British Army. Forbes proved to be a jealous and suspicious tyrant who ruled the household with an iron hand. Just prior to the German bombing campaign of London, Lansbury's mother was presented with the opportunity to take her children to North America, and under cover of dark of night they fled from their unhappy home and sailed for Montreal; from there they headed to New York City. When her mother settled in Hollywood following a fund-raising Canadian tour of a Noel Coward play, Lansbury (and later her brothers) joined her there.


Love,

Chatty Crone

4 comments:

^..^Corgidogmama said...

Really interesting info on Angela Lansbury, I always liked her too.
I flunked it IQ test big time.

Joyce said...

Thank you so much for the good laugh this morning. I really needed it. The first set of joks were priceless.

Love and Hugs,
Joyce

Chatty Crone said...

It's nice to know that laughter is out there for us isn't it? Makes the world so much better.

ClassyChassy said...

The bats are the best! YIKES!