For 2017

"Life is lived forward, but understood backward. It is not until we are down the road and we stand on the mountain looking back through the valley that we can appreciate the terrain God has allowed us to scale.” Jill Savage

Friday, October 01, 2010

Fun Friday with a little help from my friends . . .

Every tree and plant in the meadow seemed to be dancing, those which average eyes would see as fixed and still.



One day my mother was out and my dad was in charge of me.

I was maybe 2-1/2 years old. Someone had given me a little 'tea set' as a gift and it was one of my favorite toys.

Daddy was in the living room engrossed in the evening news when I brought Daddy a little cup of 'tea', which was just water. After several cups of tea and lots of praise for such yummy tea, my Mom came home.

My Dad made her wait in the living room to watch me bring him a cup of tea, because it was 'just the cutest thing!' My Mom waited, and sure enough, here I come down the hall with a cup of tea for Daddy and she watches him drink it up.

Then she says, (as only a mother would know.. :)


'Did it ever occur to you that the only place she can reach water is the toilet?
(Thanks Monica.)


WICOE
(Women In Charge Of Everything)

Is proud to announce the opening of its EVENING CLASSES FOR MEN!
OPEN TO MEN ONLY - ALL ARE WELCOME

Note: due to the complexity and level of difficulty, each course will accept a maximum of eight participants

The course covers two days, and topics covered in this course include:

DAY ONE

HOW TO FILL ICE CUBE TRAYS
Step by step guide with slide presentation

TOILET ROLLS - DO THEY GROW ON THE HOLDERS?
Roundtable discussion

DIFFERENCES BETWEEN LAUNDRY BASKET & FLOOR
Practising with hamper (Pictures and graphics)

DISHES & SILVERWARE; DO THEY LEVITATE/FLY TO KITCHEN SINK OR DISHWASHER BY THEMSELVES?
Debate among a panel of experts.

REMOTE CONTROL
Losing the remote control - Help line and support groups

LEARNING HOW TO FIND THINGS
Starting with looking in the right place Instead of turning the house upside down while screaming -
Open forum


DAY TWO -

EMPTY MILK CARTONS;
DO THEY BELONG IN THE FRIDGE OR THE BIN?
Group discussion and role play

HEALTH WATCH;
BRINGING HER FLOWERS IS NOT HARMFUL TO YOUR HEALTH
PowerPoint presentation

REAL MEN ASK FOR DIRECTIONS WHEN LOST
Real life testimonial from the one man who did

IS IT GENETICALLY IMPOSSIBLE TO SIT QUIETLY AS SHE PARALLEL PARKS?
Driving simulation

LIVING WITH ADULTS;
BASIC DIFFERENCES BETWEEN YOUR MOTHER AND YOUR PARTNER
Online class and role playing

HOW TO BE THE IDEAL SHOPPING COMPANION
Relaxation exercises, meditation and breathing techniques

REMEMBERING IMPORTANT DATES & CALLING WHEN YOU'RE GOING TO BE LATE
Bring your calendar or PDA to class

GETTING OVER IT;
LEARNING HOW TO LIVE WITH BEING WRONG ALL THE TIME
Individual counsellors available
(Thanks Jerry)


Click on link below: The Yankee or Dixie quiz (Thanks Sharon)

Now I need your report back to tell me if you are a Yankee or a Dixie -





AN INTERESTING FACT ABOUT AUGUST 2010.

This August has 5 Sundays, 5 Mondays, 5 Tuesdays, all in one month.

It happens once in 823 years. We will probably miss it next time
(Thanks Monica)



Birthday Clock

It tells you how many hours and how many seconds you have been alive on this earth and when you were probably conceived. How cool is that? This is cool. After you've finished reading the info, click again, and see what the moon looked like the night you were born. This is neat. Who says our time clocks aren't ticking.... Click this: Birthday Calculator
(Thank you Sharon).





Theft Problem -- IMPORTANT MESSAGE:

You've heard about people who have been abducted and had their kidneys removed by black-market organ thieves.

My thighs were stolen from me during the night a few years ago. I went to sleep and woke up with someone else's thighs. It was just that quick. The replacements had the texture of cooked oatmeal. Whose thighs were these and what happened to mine?

I spent the entire summer looking for my thighs. Finally, hurt and angry, I resigned myself to living out my life in jeans. And then the thieves struck again.

My butt was next. I knew it was the same gang because they took pains to match my new rear-end to the thighs they had stuck me with earlier. But my new butt was attached at least three inches lower than my original! I realized I'd have to give up my jeans in favor of long skirts.

Two years ago I realized my arms had been switched. One morning I was fixing my hair and was horrified to see the flesh of my upper arm swing to and fro with the motion of the hairbrush. This was really getting scary - my body was being replaced one section at a time. What could they do to me next?

When my poor neck suddenly disappeared and was replaced with a turkey neck I decided to tell my story.

Women of the worldwake up and smell the coffee! Those 'plastic' surgeons are using REAL replacement body parts -stolen from you and me! The next time someone you know has something 'lifted', look again - was it lifted from you?

THIS IS NOT A HOAX!!! This is happening to women everywhere every night!

WARN YOUR FRIENDS!

P. S. Last year I thought someone had stolen my boobs. I was lying in bed and they were gone! But when I jumped out of bed, I was relieved to see that they had just been hiding in my armpits as I slept. Now I keep them hidden in my waistband.
(Thanks Karen)



FINALLY..THE BLONDE JOKE TO END
ALL BLONDE JOKES


A blonde woman was speeding down the road in her little red sports car and was pulled over by a woman police officer who was also a blonde.

The blonde cop asked to see the blonde driver's license. She dug through her purse and was getting progressively more agitated. 'What does it look like?' she finally asked.

The policewoman replied, 'It's square and it has your picture on it.'

The driver finally found a square mirror in her purse, looked at it and handed it to the
policewoman. 'Here it is,' she said.

The blonde officer looked at the mirror, then handed it back saying, OK, you can go. I didn't realize you were a cop.'




"Laughter is the tonic, the relief, and the surcease for pain." ~ Charlie Chaplin>

"Life is too short to spend what precious time you have alive being unhappy." ~ Bruce Willis


HAVE FUN TODAY Y'ALL

Sandie

Who noticed anything with the pictures? Something they all have in common?

20 comments:

Gaston Studio said...

I'm 98% pure Dixie, Sandi, and laughed at all your jokes here, especially the blonde one!
Have a great day.

Linda in New Mexico said...

Well below the Mason Dixon line, ya'll. You post is so fun. Thanks for the chuckles and the pictures of the flower people. The Olde Bagg

Susan said...

Hi Sandie...Great post, as always. Loved it. I took the quiz and came out 9% Dixie so guess I'm a Yankee, almost through and through. But I LOVE all the Dixie ladies I meet in blogland, including YOU.

Had to chuckle over yesterday's post. That rude lady you encountered? Oh, you GO girl. I would have added the word "IGNORANT B----."

One time, in Arizona, I was driving and planned to turn right into a parking space. Changed my mind. The guy behind me yelled out his window, "What's your IQ, 10?"

In split second mode, I stuck my head out the window and retorted, "You idiot. What's yours, MINUS ZERO?"

My kids slid down to the floorboards, I burst out laughing, and drove on.

There are all kinds of jerks in the world, Sandie. Sad but true, but we don't have to let them get the best of us.

Have a fabulous Friday, chickie. Susan

Linda @ A La Carte said...

Such a fun Friday! Love the jokes as always. They make me smile...good way to start the weekend.

Linda @ A La Carte said...

I had to come back after taking the test! I'm 41% Dixie...barely in Yankeedom! Guess growing up all over the USA made me a mixture!

Pat MacKenzie said...

The pictures were interesting, if a little creepy. The jokes were funny but I'm afraid I'm neither Yankee nor Dixie. Does Canuck count?

Joyce said...

Interesting photos. Did not do the test but I have to say the jokes made me laugh out loud. Thanks for sharing and have a good weekend.
Joyce

Ginny said...

O.K. this post is just AMAZING!!! How long does it take you to do your posts, anyway?? Everything is just so funny! While I was reading it, I noticed that something wasn't quite right about the flowers, and they were so different. So then I went back and looked more closely. They aren't flowers, they're people!! So THAT'S what happened to all the flower chiildren from the 60's!! Those LSD side effects can really be something!

Jane said...

Too funy! Especially loved the cop joke! Ah, yes, the flowers - people flowers!

Jane

Melanie said...

Enjoyed your post, Sandie!
The little girl getting the water was too cute.
I did the birthday clock. That is so cool.
I'm 68% Dixie...no surprise there!!
Have a great weekend! :)

That corgi :) said...

I'll have to come back and do the birthday clock; sounds like a fun thing to do. LOL with the joke with the girl and the tea set! and interesting fact about August 2010; didn't catch that on the calendar myself. Wow,over 800 years before it happens again! wonder what the world will be like then!

betty

Chicken Wrangler said...

Good reading today! And the photos were so interesting!!! You find some dandies!

Debbie said...

I'm 40% Dixie and laughing my tail off at the blonde joke!

Angela said...

Hey Sandie!

I loved the pictures! They were AWESOME!!!!!

Have a Wonderful Weekend!
Angela

Doris Sturm said...

Like what, Sandie, the fact that they are all women? Or is it not that obvious? Maybe I need to count them to see if they all have the same number of women?

I loved this post. Thanks for cheering me up. I'm very tired. Just thought and check in with you.

Love,
Doris and Gizzy

(thanks, I'm 58)

BECKY said...

Hey Chatty! That was a fun contest...and guess what?? I'm 55% Dixie! And I'm a Midwesterner through and through! Who knew?!
Loved the jokes and the flower ladies, too!

Rose said...

born in the North, but a Dixie forever. loved your post just so funny. thanks.

Katie said...

That little girl was so cute! :)

Took the quiz. 65% Dixie. I think it messed up! ;)

Katie ♥

The Quintessential Magpie said...

I am strongly Dixie... I still use Confederate money! LOL

Just checking in with you to say "hi" and to let you know how much I appreciate the prayers for Mr. Magpie. He's ao much better. YEA! And I hope to be blogging again in a week or so. I've missed you, my friend.

Hope you had fun in Orlando. I will come back later and check the pictures. Mr. Magpie is calling me to go to the cleaners.

XO,

Sheila :-)

Live Out Loud said...

I can picture the father's face in the first story!

I LOVE the men classes! They totally need to teach this in school - before they're allowed to date. That'd be awesome.

My score - "38% Dixie. You are definitely a Yankee."
Not too surprised there...

My Native American Zodiac sign is Hawk - very cool! And I am not yet 1 billion seconds old...

And Tuesday is my lucky day - that's today! Interesting coincedence...

That blonde joke is fantastic! I'm sending it to my cousin - he'll love it!