What soap is to the body, laughter is to the soul. -Yiddish proverb
Life can change in one split second - I know this for a fact! Here are some split seconds.
These are hysterically funny! Look at your own risk!
Once upon a time
in a land far away,
a beautiful, independent,
happened upon a frog as she sat
contemplating ecological issues
on the shores of an unpolluted pond
in a verdant meadow near her castle.
The frog hopped into the princess' lap
and said: ' Elegant Lady,
I was once a handsome prince,
until an evil witch cast a spell upon me.
One kiss from you, however,
and I will turn back
into the dapper, young prince that I am
and then, my sweet, we can marry
and set up housekeeping in your castle
with my mother,
where you can prepare my meals,
clean my clothes, bear my children,
and forever feel
grateful and happy doing so. '
as the princess dined sumptuously
on lightly sauteed frog legs
seasoned in a white wine
and onion cream sauce,
she chuckled and thought to herself:
I don't freaking think so.
HOW SMART IS YOUR RIGHT FOOT?
You have to try this please, it takes 2 seconds. I could not believe this!!!
It is from an orthopaedic surgeon............
This will boggle your mind and will keep you trying over and over
again to see if you can outsmart your foot, but, you can't.
It's pre-programmed in your brain!
1. Without anyone watching you (they will think you are GOOFY......)
and while sitting at your desk in front of your computer, lift your
right foot off the floor and make clockwise circles.
2. Now, while doing this, draw the number "6" in the air with your
right hand. Your foot will change direction.
I told you so!!! And there's nothing you can do about it! You and I
both know how stupid it is, but before the day is done you are going
to try it again, if you've not already done so.
Can you guess which of the following are true and which are false?
(Answers are below)
1. Apples, not caffeine, are more efficient at waking you up in the morning..
2. Alfred Hitchcock didn't have a belly button.
3. A pack-a-day smoker will lose approximately 2 teeth every 10 years.
4. People do not get sick from cold weather; it's from being indoors a lot more.
5. When you sneeze, all bodily functions stop, even your heart!
6. Only 7 per cent of the population are lefties.
7. Forty people are sent to the hospital for dog bites every minute.
8. Babies are born without kneecaps. They don't appear until they are 2-6 years old.
9. The average person over 50 will have spent 5 years waiting in lines.
10. The toothbrush was invented in 1498.
11. The average housefly lives for one month.
12. 40,000 Americans are injured by toilets each year.
13. A coat hanger is 44 inches long when straightened.
14. The average computer user blinks 7 times a minute.
15. Your feet are bigger in the afternoon than any other time of day
16. Most of us have eaten a spider in our sleep.
17. The REAL reason ostriches stick their head in the sand is to search for water.
18. The only two animals that can see behind themselves without turning their heads are the rabbit and the parrot.
19. John Travolta turned down the starring roles in 'An Officer and a Gentleman' and 'Tootsie.'
20. Michael Jackson owns the rights to the South Carolina State Anthem.
21. In most television commercials advertising milk, a mixture of white paint and a little thinner is used in place of the milk.
22. Prince Charles and Prince William NEVER travel on the same airplane, just in case there is a crash.
23. The first Harley Davidson motorcycle built in 1903 used a tomato can for a carburetor.
24. Most hospitals make money by selling the umbilical cords cut from women who give birth. They are used in vein transplant surgery.
25. Humphrey Bogart was related to Princess Diana. They were 7th cousins.
26. If coloring wasn't added to Coca-Cola, it would be green.
Now, the answers are at the very end!
Gene Simmons - from Kiss - In a Military Salute - yes believe it or not!
New wine for Seniors...
I kid you not....
New Wine for Seniors
California vintners in the Napa Valley area, which primarily produce Pinot Blanc, Pinot Noir and Pinot Grigio wines, have developed a new hybrid grape that acts as an anti-diuretic.
It is expected to reduce the number of trips older people have to make to the bathroom during the night.
The new wine will be marketed as
What is a calorie?
Calories are the little bastards that get into your wardrobe at
night and sew your clothes tighter.
MY CLOSET IS INFESTED WITH THE LITTLE GUYS!
This is so bad - PG13 - but so funny - sorry!
Answers to Trivia: They are All TRUE... Now go back and think about #16!!!