Thanks Sharon N! (friend)
A CRAZY MARRIAGE PROPOSAL! Thanks Jerry from As The Cracker Crumbles
spiked, multicolored hair that's green, purple and
orange. His clothes are a tattered mix of leather rags.
His legs are bare and he's without shoes. His entire
face and body are riddled with pierced jewelry and
his earrings are big, bright feathers.
He sits down in the only vacant seat, directly across
from a man who Just glares at him for the next ten
miles. Finally, the punk gets self conscious and barks
at the old man.
"What are you looking at you old man......didn't you
ever do anything wild when you were young?"
Without missing a beat, the old man replies: "Yeah.
Back when I was young and in the Navy, I got really
drunk in Singapore and made love to a parrot. I thought
maybe you were my son."
Thanks Jeannie (cousin)
Woman Contacts Technical Support...
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and I noticed a distinct slowdown in the overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewellery applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0 .
In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed undesirable programs such as NEWS 5.0, MONEY 3.0 and CRICKET 4.1 .
Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2. 6 simply crashes the system.
Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.
What can I do?
First, keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system.
Please enter command: ithoughtyoulovedme.html and try to download Tears 6.2 and do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update. If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewellery 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.
However, remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Silence 2.5 , Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1 .Please note that Beer 6. 1 is a very bad program that will download the Farting and Snoring Loudly Beta.
Whatever you do, DO NOT under any circumstances install Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.)
In addition, please do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0 .
In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance.
We recommend: Cooking 3.0 and Hot Looks 7.7.
Good Luck Madam!
(Thanks Jerry at As the Cracker Crumbles)
"We can live a life full and complete, thinking with our heads but living from our hearts.”
Helen Hunt, M.A
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