For 2017

"Life is lived forward, but understood backward. It is not until we are down the road and we stand on the mountain looking back through the valley that we can appreciate the terrain God has allowed us to scale.” Jill Savage

Friday, February 10, 2012

Friday - with a little help from my friends....


Where are my keys - I must have left them in the car.
Frantically, I headed for the parking lot.
My wife has scolded me many times for leaving the keys in the ignition.
My theory is the ignition is the best place not to lose them.
Her theory is that the car will be stolen.
As I burst through the doors of the church, I came to a terrifying conclusion.....her theory was right.
The parking lot was empty. I immediately called the police.
I gave them my location, confessed that I had left my keysin the car, and that it had been stolen.
Then I made the most difficult call of all, “Honey,”I stammered.
I always call her “honey” in times likethese. “I left my keys in the car, and it has been stolen.”
There was a period of silence. I thought the call had been dropped, but then I heard her voice. “Ken” she barked,“I dropped you off!”
Now it was my time to be silent. Embarrassed, I said,“Well, come and get me.”
Diane retorted, “I will, as soon as I convince this policeman I have not stolen your car."



What are these?



Couple in their nineties are both having problems remembering things. During a checkup, the doctor tells them that they're physically okay, but they might want to start writing things down to help them remember . Later that night, while watching TV, the old man gets up from his chair. 'Want anything while I'm in the kitchen?' he asks.
'Will you get me a bowl of ice cream?''Sure.''Don't you think you should write it down so you can remember it?' she asks.
'No, I can remember it..'
'Well, I'd like some strawberries on top, too. Maybe you should write it down, so as not to forget it?'
He says, 'I can remember that. You want a bowl of ice cream with strawberries.'
'I'd also like whipped cream. I'm certain you'll forget that, write it down?' she asks.
Irritated, he says, 'I don't need to write it down, I can remember it! Ice cream with strawberries and whipped cream - I got it, for goodness sake!'
Then he toddles into the kitchen. After about 20 minutes, The old man returns from the kitchen and hands his wife a plate of bacon and eggs.. She stares at the plate for a moment.
'Where's my toast ?'
(This is so funny to me because it is the truth in our house - chatty)
Thanks Ann from The Boston Lady





PECANS IN THE CEMETERY......

On the outskirts of a small town, there was a big, old pecan tree just inside the cemetery fence. One day, two boys filled up a bucketful of nuts and sat down by the tree, out of sight, and began dividing the nuts.

'One for you, one for me, one for you, one for me,' said one boy. Several dropped and rolled down toward the fence.

Another boy came riding along the road on his bicycle. As he passed, he thought he heard voices from inside the cemetery. He slowed down to investigate. Sure enough, he heard, 'One for you, one for me, one for you, one for me...'

He just knew what it was. He jumped back on his bike and rode off. Just around the bend he met an old man with a cane, hobbling along.

'Come here quick,' said the boy, 'you won't believe what I heard! Satan and the Lord are down at the cemetery dividing up the souls!'

The man said, 'Beat it kid, can't you see it's hard for me to walk.' When the boy insisted though, the man hobbled slowly to the cemetery.

Standing by the fence they heard, 'One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me.'

The old man whispered, 'Boy, you've been tellin' me the truth. Let's see if we can see the Lord...?

Shaking with fear, they peered through the fence, yet were still unable to see anything. The old man and the boy gripped the wrought iron bars of the fence tighter and tighter as they tried to get a glimpse of the Lord.

At last they heard, 'One for you, one for me. That's all. Now let's go get those nuts by the fence and we'll be done...

They say the old man had the lead for a good half-mile before the kid on the bike passed him.

Thanks cousin Marlyn


10 Things PMS Stands For:

1. Pass My Shotgun

2. Psychotic Mood Shift

3. Perpetual Munching Spree

4. Puffy Mid-Section

5. People Make me Sick

6. Provide Me Sweets

7. Pardon My Sobbing

8. Pimples May Surface

9. Pass My Sweatpants

and my favorite one:

10. Potential Murder Suspect

Thank you Sharon N.

How do they do this?

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THOUGHT OF THE DAY:

"It takes a revolution to make a solution."
~ Bob Marley

Now an update on the bullying situation. GS came home from school today and said the boy was gone from his school and had moved to another school.
I am kind of shocked to say the least.
I didn't want to hurt or change his life.
I just wanted him to leave the GS alone.
I guess I won't ever know the whole story now.
I wish him luck.
But the school counselor did tell me this. Because the GS did not tell them they were playing a game at the time - she felt that he was a liar - and that being called gay in a game was not the same thing as being called a gay directly. This is from the public school system. My GS was brought into her room and admonished so much he was crying. So he is now the problem.
And people wonder why people don't go in and talk with the administration.
Frankly, they don't believe you. Well as far as I am concerned it is over and I am releasing this to God and continuing to pray for school number 3.
x_3bb458d1

43 comments:

Melanie said...

Those stories were so funny, Sandie. I really like the pecan one.
I know my mom would really like that grandmother sign!
Have a great weekend!

Cheri said...

Your stories today were really great and I had a good laugh. Now as far as the GS situation...you are right, we don't go to the administration because they don't believe us. Our kids never wanted us to go to the administration, they said it would make their problems worse and now I understand "why."

The Boston Lady said...

Well, Sandie, that is a sad statement on GS's school admin. I would suspect that the bully had been having issues with other kids as well and maybe his parents were tired of being called out on it. Maybe this will be best for everyone included - we all learn from life.

Thanks for the funnies! Ann

Rae said...

Those are laugh out loud funny. I enjoyed all of them. Hope you have a great weekend.

dr momi said...

I've had my chuckles for the day! Thanks. And there I am on your sidebar...lol, thank-you :-)

I had my share of school administration problems when the kids were growing up. Gr-r-r-r-.

Knitty said...

I wish it wasn't true about school administrations but I know that it is. You have a good attitude though and maybe this can be a (painful) lesson to Andy that sometimes things aren't fair but it is still (always!) best to do what a person knows is right.

Love the jokes but does it bother anyone else that the clip done in French is pointing out only what Americans do that is not eco-friendly? My high school French isn't good enough to understand all of what was said, especially at that speed so maybe I am being unnecessarily touchy.

Marti said...

Thanks for the funnies. And it is no different to call names while playing or not. That administration is just wrong. It hurts just as much no matter what the circumstances. Shame on the school.

lailani said...

So glad I got online...You made me giggle and now the day can go pleasantly :)

Sandra said...

daffy duck said it all, amen amen and amen to that comment. now i am wondering how they did that thing of walking out of the photo. hummmmm curiouser and couriouser.

Melissa Ann Goodwin said...

Thank heavens it's Friday so I can come here and laugh. I love those stories. I think you've got the only answer on that last one - giving it over and saying some prayers.

Nezzy said...

What a great way to end the week!!! Heeehehehehe!!! You always crack me up.

I'm so sorry GS is havin' the problems he is. I too will continue to pray for him.

God bless ya sweetie and have a fantablous weekend!!! :o)

Raindrops and Daisies said...

Love the ones about PMS!!!

Hope that you have a great weekend Sandie.

x Fiona

Linda @ A La Carte said...

Good ones! I love the first story...that cracked me up! hugs to you on this funny friday! Linda

TexWisGirl said...

thanks for all the laughs, today! :)

Shelly said...

I am so sorry for all the troubles your gs is going through, and I pray they come to an end soon.

Loved all your funnies today, and the PMS one made me laugh really loudly!

Kathy ... aka Nana said...

Thank you for the laughs! What a great way to start the weekend!

Betsy from Tennessee said...

Hi Sandie, I hate to say this --but it's not just the public school administration that makes those terrible decisions. It can come from ANYWHERE--any group ANYTIME.... People don't want to get involved --so what do they do??? Ignore it --or find an excuse not to deal with it. It's a society problem... I hate bullying --but nobody wants to get involved to fix it... Such a shame.

On a positive note, your Friday blog post is CUTE... Love the jokes/stories.... The cemetery one is hilarious.

Hugs,
Betsy

SweetMarie said...

Thanks so much for the laughs! You've got me cracking up here!
Hubby will enjoy these later. :)
As far as your GS situation I will email you. I've been through it.
Hope you have a fun weekend!

Dolores said...

So many funny and cute graphics and stories....thanks for the smile on my face.

Eva Ason said...

Funny stories today my friend ^_^ I like the juggling photo tehee...and the PMS explanation is brilliant!
Have a great day my friend. Big hugs x

Eva

Happier Than a Pig in Mud said...

I'd say the PMS one is timely:@) Happy Weekend!

Remington said...

Great post! Thanks! BTW -- how do they do that?

Debby@Just Breathe said...

Where's my toast! So funny. You have a great weekend and I will continue to pray for your GS.

Catherine said...

Wishing you a happy full of love and hearts weekend Sandie!
xo Catherine

Tanna at The Brick Street Bungalow said...

Man, the school situation is tough, Sandie. I'm so sending hugs!!

Now, about that toast??? ;)

Susan said...

Hi Sandie...

Enjoyed the stories and got a hoot out of them. Thanks for the chuckles.

Be vigilent with GS, Sandie. Make sure you get in there and ADVOCATE for him....every minute now, until he leaves.

Our children need us to back them up from start to finish in situations like these. Don't let a single day go by without your communicating with that school administration.

Man, things like that really SIZZLE me.

Take care, dear Sandie. Susan

Angela said...

The PMS ones are hilarious! lol

Happy Fun Friday!
Angela

Michaele said...

Thanks so much for the big smiles today Chatty. I actually had to battle with the school this week also. Ours had a little better outcome and that was just lucky.

GrammyK said...

Thanks for the laughs!! Had to read the stories out loud to the family!!! "One for you. One for me..." Giggle!!

DH and I both had bad public school experiences and that was one of the biggest reasons we decided to homeschool. Shucks, we weren't even Christians at the time!! In fact it was because of the curriculum that we used that we got saved. The Lord is Sooo...good!! :-) Praying that He will open the doors to His perfect will for your lives and that your GS will not be too scarred by what he is going through. People can be just plain mean!

Have an awesome and blessed weekend!!

Nancy's Notes said...

Loved the laughs so much, they were way too cute! Praying for your GS too.

Have a great weekend~

Karen Lange said...

Thanks for the chuckles! Will pray for your GS.
Hugs and blessings,
Karen

Susan J. Reinhardt said...

Scripture tells us that laughter is like medicine. You sure gave us a big dose today!

✿ⒹⒺⒺ✿@ A Lapin Life said...

Hi Sandie,

Thanks for the jokes.

xo,
Dee

Jeanie said...

Good stories today!
I still have faith that things will look much better for your grandson soon.

DaCraftyLady said...

Oh so true about Daffy...lol...loved the stories...laughing is the cure for everyday blues, thanks for the medicine to cure the blues... :) Debb

Ann said...

Oh my gosh, I can't believe they sat there and said your grandson was a liar. I am so glad that I don't have to deal with the schools any more. I wish you the best with school #3

silverthoughts2 said...

I love #2 on that PMS list!

Wanda's Wings said...

I always enjoy the laugh I get when I read your blog. I really liked the PMS one the best I think.

A Quiet Corner said...

Your PMS list was hysterical!!!!...:)JP

Mevely317 said...

LOVE the tale of the "stolen" car! Perhaps I can relate at some level? :)

Re. your grandson? I've never worked in the school system, and hold no degree in psychology, but there's this little part of me that wants to knock that counselor's lights out! I can image Andy's heartache ... and yours. Hugs!

Sharon said...

I can remember some "run-ins" with the school system when my boys were growing up. In a bend-over-backwards attempt to be "fair-minded" they often saw situations completely wrong.

Continuing to pray for school number 3.

xo

Life 101 said...

Pass my sweatpants, made me laugh out loud.
You do a really good job with your blog.

Grandma Bonnie said...

I need the grandmother sign. I have one about grandpa it says "If Grandma Says no ask Grandpa"