For 2017

"Life is lived forward, but understood backward. It is not until we are down the road and we stand on the mountain looking back through the valley that we can appreciate the terrain God has allowed us to scale.” Jill Savage

Thursday, May 03, 2012

Thursday - Thinking Deep


God is so good! Lol. Yesterday I wrote about wishing you could do things, but not doing them. Keeping them in the mind. Well that was part of it anyway.

I went to lunch and shopping with Linda yesterday. While I was gone the school nurse called and said GS had come in there and said his throat hurt.

Get home and daughter and I decide to take him to the doctor for a strep test. We were going to turn around and go right back out (this is also to tell you why I am late in getting to the blogs and emails again - lol).

We always go to the bathroom before we go out.

Daughter went first and after a minute yelled, "Mom did you put plastic in the toilet?"

I said, "Plastic, what do you mean?"

She goes, "Plastic!"

Well that didn't help explain - I just didn't say anymore and went on to get ready to go.

Then she yells, "(Grandson's name) did you put plastic in the toilet?"

At first he didn't say anything, but he quickly admitted to it I have to say.

He had taken saran wrap and put it from one side of the toilet to the other side - then put the toilet seat down.

Kelly had used the bathroom and you can imagine the rest - thank God it was a bit lose and all 'things' went in the toilet and not out. But think about the clean up.

Okay we proceed to the doctor and he got a severe lecture all the way over there - 30+ minutes.

Now this is the clincher - last weekend at his dad's house - his dad told him the practical joke and that it sure would be funny if he did it here. He didn't learn it from school where you would think he would have - he learned it from his father!

What the heck do you think about that? If someone told me to do it - I would laugh (maybe), but I would never do it. Why didn't the grandson know better? (Be kind with me here.)

What kind of man/father tells his son to do that to his mother? Yes they are divorced and it was not a good divorce. But still. He KNEW the grandson would get in trouble here. Grandson KNEW if he did it at his dad's house his dad would "hurt him" - his words. Father sold out his own son - to spite his mother - they have been divorced since 2003.

Sheesh and I'm worried about my grandson doing something like this. I love him to death, but I know he should have known better - he's 11! So why did he do it? Was he trying to win his dad's love (he doesn't think his dad loves him) - or what?

Okay it is a little funny because I do know some of you will think that - after all it was the daughter and not me - but if it was me - I'd be mad too. Psychoanalyze this (gently) because I am at a lost what to think! Believe it or not.

The whole purpose of education is to turn mirrors into windows.” Sidney Harris-Columnist

Love, Chatty

62 comments:

Rhonda said...

UHMMMM I AM THINKING ABOUT THIS ONE!

Debbie said...

Please forgive me for the fact that the first thing I did was laugh. Yes, it's true. I laughed only because I could see your GS's face as he did it. That's my favorite age for boys. Who will, when it's all said and done, be boys.

I'm not minimizing it because I agree that he needs to know not to do every "funny" thing someone tells him to do.

You have been given the blessing of the teachable moment. It's good that it happened at home so you don't find yourself apologizing all over town. I would give him latrine duty for a while so he can think about the consequences of not thinking before he does a joke.

And I would show him that even someone close to him who is not trying to hurt him can give him bad advice or example because we're all so stinking human. And I would tell him to remember that when someone else he likes (friend, etc.) tells him to do something for fun.

Teachable moment for the times when life is in the toilet!

Sandra said...

odd this happened, i had never heard of this, but last week when i did the post on bob playing the pracitical joke on me by scaring me in the dark, my best friend sent me and email and said her husband and 3 sons love practical jokes, they pull them on each other all the time, putting saran wrap on the commode is one she told me they loved to do to each other. never heard of it. so maybe this is a male thing. and i would be screaming bloody murder if it were done to me.

BelovedBomber said...

I am not sure either...all I can say from my own experience is a kid will do almost anything to gain approval from his or in my case her father.

Debbie said...

Oops. Also meant to add to mine that this is the perfect time to tell him about some other stupid things kids are doing today like the choking thing and the cinnamon challenge. Google them if you need to to scare the bejeebers out of him.

jack69 said...

Okay, I didn't laugh LONG! LOL and yes I can imagine most boys thinking this would be hilarious.
I am so glad that many things did not exist when I was a kid. We had nothing as transparent as plastic wrap.
yes, that was VERY MEAN of the father, he needs his ---- kicked for getting his son in trouble.
And yes, I can imagine the messy terrible clean up, but the boy could not think that far ahead. Don't be too hard on him. He thought everyone would get a good laugh out of it.

We have had a messy divorce in our family, and I hate it!!!!

About the throat....

I hope it is not strep. that is one rough illness!

Shelly said...

That was really a mean thing of his dad to do. I did get a little smile, though, at thinking your daughter thought YOU might have done it...

Louvregirl said...

I can't help you (much) except to tell you that this skill might come in handy (a funny story) for you in another circumstance. I once had to do the saran wrap over the toilet seat thing in the middle of DISNEY WORLD in the MAGIC CASTLE. Seriously!! My dear daughter had swallowed a nickle and this is the handy technique to help circumnavigate this problem. I won't share the rest of the story, except to say that...the things a Mother 'has to' go through!!!

Have faith. Teach your Grandson
what you require, expect... Set example...and he will do well (to rise above.) Speak with him about the 'ins and the outs' of practical jokes and how they can backfire. Teach him about timing, too. It is all that you can do.

Smile a lot. Hope and pray.
lg!

Changes in the wind said...

Well I think the funniest thing is that your daughter would think YOU would do such a thing...now that is weird and as far that the Dad telling GS that....He is probably more a buddy than a Dad and that is not helpful.

Eva Ason said...

That was not really a nice thing for a Dad to tell his son to do...funny that your daughter thought it was you though...
Hope you're having a good day!
Big hugs
Eva

Jill said...

I have to admit to giggling too. This is such an old practical joke. However, it wasn't done in fun (stupid) Dad and only set your GS up to get in trouble. Some guys are just...well...jerks!

It is really funny that your daughter thought YOU put the plastic on the toilet though.

That corgi :) said...

Poor GS with his sore throat/possible strep; never fun to deal with that. Honestly, Sandie, I'm with you on this one about the "practical" joke. I think there was more than a "fun" intent on the part of the father when he told GS about it. It wasn't a silly practical joke like shaving cream on a door handle, etc but I think this bordered on spiteful in so many different ways and you know the history behind their relationship, divorce, etc so much more than we do. I think there was not a good intent all ways around in his motives. Maybe GS was curious if it would work or not and that's why he did it, not sure of his motives. All in all, I would not be happy about the whole situation.

betty

Linda @ A La Carte said...

I must say I do not like practical jokes. Just don't find that kind of thing funny and never have. I think GS was trying to get some approval from his Dad. Sad as it is a child does want that approval from both his parents. You have a teachable moment but I don't know what else to tell you. Big hugs, Linda

Remington said...

Hope your GS is feeling better....it is so sad when the divorce isn't a good one....no reason people can't stay friends and forgive and forget....esp when there are children involved....

Jim said...

Good post, Sandy. Yes, a real Daddy wouldn't encourage any of that stuff.

Glad to be back,
.

Donna K. Weaver said...

That's an old college dorm gag that I heard about but never had played on me fortunately. I hate it when parents use their children as pawns against their ex spouses.

Beth said...

Oh dear....I don't know how I would have handled that one....ha ha!

Debbie said...

i'm not sure if i should laugh or cry!!

i love 11 year old boys, they still kinda like us, but by 13 it's over. by 18 they start to like us again because they need money for college. by age 25 mine loved me more then life itself. they called all the time and they took my advice. they thought i was smart.

the point is, i loved age 11!!

Arkansas Patti said...

It might have been funny if there wasn't a bad history between the parents. Think the child saw only the humor, am very leary of the dad's motives.

Susan said...

Dear Sandie...Ohhh, poor GS. He was probably thinking what a great practical joke that would be. Honestly, I don't think I'd ever think of doing that but it's a good one! ha haha

It's kind of like my putting salt in the sugar bowl on April Fool's Day when I was a kid. My father didn't appreciate that. ha ha hahahha

I'd say, hide the Saran Wrap. ha hahahha Thanks for sharing. Susan

Rose said...

Not sure what to say...there were things my brothers did, but there are things that they would not have done cause they just knew it was not to be done.

It is low of his dad to use him like that...

The Boston Lady said...

I laughed at first too, because that is a classic practical joke. But then reading on I understand it was not intended to be funny but cruel and your GS was used as the middle man. I think your GS wants to please his dad and didn't think about how it would seem to the rest of the family, with whom he lives, thank goodness. Dad sounds pretty immature and I hope he will one day grow up a realize that he son will come to understand that his father is not someone he wants to emulate - that will be a sad lesson, especially for GS. I know this has happened before Sandie, over time your wonderful GS will learn the right way to do things because he is being guided by wonderful people such as his grandma. Ann

Bev said...

Well heard that being done years ago...to newlywed homes...but I don't know what to think here.... oh boy...I guess you take it as it comes.... poor GS... I can feel for him..

The Café Sucré Farine said...

I think this is probably just a boy/man thing - think of all the things that they laugh about that women don't see any humor in. This may have just been a good opportunity for you daughter to have a "teachable moment". I suspect that someday, maybe when he's grown, they will laugh about this incident. :)

Retired English Teacher said...

This is an old dorm prank. It goes back to when I was in college. I think pranks like this do have a bit of meanness to them. I am mixed on how I feel about your GS doing this. Deep inside he might have felt, probably should have, the mean side of this. On the other hand, he felt safe to try it with you and his mom. He knows who he can trust. Your reactions would be safe, swift, and include some solid teaching. He wouldn't dare try the same thing on his dad because he most likely doesn't feel as safe there, nor does he trust the reaction from him.

TexWisGirl said...

well, i prefer to look at the humor in this and not in the darker side. just a practical joke.

Say What? said...

The scary thing here is that boys crave the love and attention from their fathers. Even if your GS knew it was wrong, he would have done it anyway. There's just something in a young boy that wants to make his father smile.

It doesn't make it ok. But maybe it'll help you and your daughter to sit him down and calmly explain to him why these things are not ok. He needs to be taught what it's like to be on the other side of the practical joke.

I have a 12 yr old and I have a feeling that if someone told him about this little joke, he'd try it on any one of us. It doesn't mean our boys are bad kids ... they are just boys. As Dr. Dobson says, we've just gotta love 'em through it.

barbara l. hale said...

Don't know about the Dad's motivation but is it possible that the boy may have just thought it might be funny and not realized that it would be messy? I'm not sure I had such good judgement at the age of 11. That's a tough one.

Ginny said...

Sandie, quit worrying, it is just a small incident in the scheme of things. I have heard of this before. Here is my take, and it is very simple. Most men just love bathroom humor. I don't know why, but they do. And add to that that his dad told him about it, a dad is a role model, it would be just TOO irresistible, ANY boy would do it!!!!

DaCraftyLady Debb said...

hmmm not sure how to comment on that? but I agree look on the lighter side...smile....Debb

Tuscany Talks said...

Just to clarify mom....I didn't think you put it there as a joke...I thought maybe it was there because it was broken and shouldn't have been used. :) I believe there is a difference between a joke and pratical joke...my fear is the bigger picture of what else he'd do to 'bond' with dad....know his dad's issues.

But he's still an awesome boy...no one denies that. We always did call him our own little Robbin Williams :)

Love ya mom!

Cranberry Morning said...

I suspect that many boys, given a bit of encouragement at that age, would do the same thing. He probably only saw it as funny. It's the dad that needs to grow up. (IMHO, of course.) :-)

Grandma Bonnie said...

Hmm, I did not laugh at this one. I too would have been upset. I guess it it a lesson for your grandson. I am not a fan of pratical jokes. I tried to teach my sons that there is always someone hurt even if it is just feelings.

Lisa @ Two Bears Farm said...

Please don't worry about it! As someone who may, just possibly, have pulled this exact prank on my little brother...it was just meant to be funny. Nothing else. No malice. I'm sure GS just thought everyone would find it amusing. It takes a while to learn that practical jokes aren't always so funny.

Wendy said...

I got wrapped in industrial clingfilm once (when I worked in a salmon factory). We all had fun carrying out pranks as it helped us get through the day (which was cold and monotinous). I was one of the worst pranksters, I must confess! Anyway, some of the resipricants of my pranks got their own back one day and wrapped me from head to foot in great big giant rolls of industrial cling wrap - then they wheeled me into the 'wet' room where they left me in the middle of the floor rather red faced!!! The manager came to my rescue as he tried to keep a straight face but he had a hard job because I looked like a giant caterpillar (he later told me this on a date)... yes it turned out to be a great ice breaker!!!!!

Perhaps dad was trying to be smart but it backfired because his little one got into bother. I don't suppose he thought about that happening however, just as long as he got a laugh.

For the nost part, pranks can be a bit of harmless fun but sometimes, they can go too far... and you should always consider the person on the receiving end and only carry pranks out if you know they will not offend!

Paula said...

Ex-sons-in-law can do some mean things.

Angela said...

I just don't know Sandie... I do know my husband would never encourage our son to do such a thing. But I also am still in the theme of yesterday's post where I want to say have your grandson to do the same thing at his dad's house right before you pick him up! Or hey, even you could go inside and do it before you leave! lol

Michaele said...

I think he is just a young boy and didn't think it through. It is a good joke, but best not done on your mom or grandma. It is a little funny that your daughter asked you if you did it first. hehe I know I am not much help.

DeanO said...

Men

A Quiet Corner said...

Yikes! Funny at first but the more I think about it...NOT! I'm with you sister...he knows better!...:)JP

Walking on Sunshine... said...

Not very nice of his father to tell him to do it at your house knowing one of you would make a mess all over the place. NOT funny. Hope he's feeling better and learned a lesson. His father, on the other hand, is a totally different story.

In Love With Sunflower said...

I do naughty things at home but have never done anything like that. Whatever the purpose of doing that prank, I hope both mother and son have talked about it already and is considered "water under the bridge."
:D

GrammyK said...

Well, there's no excuse for lack of maturity with the practical joke (the dad, not GS--last time I checked 11 isn't very mature! Ha Ha!) but that's just kinda mean. :-( Just another wonderful occasion to show your GS what unconditional love looks like. It was funny that your daughter's first thought was that you did it!! :-)

Many blessings!! <3

Mariette VandenMunckhof-Vedder said...

Dearest Sandie,

Guess you don't need to ask anyone else as the first photo you put there sums it ALL up. A good Daddy should be a role model and especially at this tender age of his son. There are better jokes that really could cause some healthy laughter!
Love to you,

Mariette

Whosyergurl said...

HOW old is he? I always say "boys will be boys and men will be boys, too!"
There are so many things that Doug says/does that I think are NOT funny and he thinks is hilarious. I say "stop being so sophomoric" this is when he mocks me.
ugh.
Men.
xo, Cheryl

Debby@Just Breathe said...

Of course he should know better but he is only 11. If he had learned it at school...maybe, but his dad telling him to try it on his mom, that's wrong. It's really sad how children have to feel so pressured to be loved.
Love, Debby

Annmarie Pipa said...

well, it is funny.

Betsy from Tennessee said...

I must admit that this falls under some of the stunts we pulled when I was in college. We'd wrap the toilet seats or short-sheet the beds, etc. etc. etc... It was all done for fun---and nobody seemed to get upset about it...

I don't know your grandson's father --but he probably didn't mean anything by it --other than fun!!!! I wouldn't have made such a big deal out of it...

He's a BOY... Boys do crazy things.. I am glad that his Dad is in his life. Hopefully, most of the time, he is a good influence...

This situation? I wouldn't have thought much about it--even if it had have made a mess.... It's really kinda funny if you get to thinking about it.

Sorry if this is not what you wanted to hear. I'm just a practical joker at heart...
Hugs,
Betsy

Rob-bear said...

Nobody died in the process. Which is the most important thing. At least for a Bear.

Annesphamily said...

Hi friend! I hate to see a kiddo used to spite the other parent! UGH! We had a kid at the office who needs surgery. The mom cancelled because the doctor said dad had to be involved too because they share custody! To use a child to spite the former spouse ought to be against the law!
I know your GS learned a lesson from this one.
Good to see you. I am always trying to catch up here!

Gina Gao said...

This is a really interesting read. I really enjoy going through your blog.

www.modernworld4.blogspot.com

Maria@BubblegumandDuctTape said...

oh Sandie, I'm sorry but I laughed as I was reading it. I just thought it was funny. I wouldn't think about it too much or think too much into it. He probably just thought it would be a funny thing to do. I would hope his father isn't asking him to do these things. I think that the boy will respond it however you respond to it. I have an older brother who always had a practical joke up his sleeve. Some kids are just like that.

Sweet Tea said...

I don't want to minimize this, but I think it was "a kid being a kid". I did some silly things when I was that age, didn't you? And some of them I got into trouble for, as well I should have. I can see where an 11 yr. old boy would think that was a hoot...Now, the Dad suggesting he do it at your house - he's the one that should be in trouble. . .Bottomline, "just childish sillyness on your grandson's part"...That's my opinion. Now I'll have to read what others have said.

LL Cool Joe said...

I just popped over from Lynn's blog and sorry I couldn't help but laugh. I have 2 daughters of 13 and 17 and I've experienced many naughtier situations than this! :D Kids! Well.. and Dads!

SweetMarie said...

My son always told me her wanted a sister so that he could pull pranks on her. My ex-husband, of ten years now, was visiting Kyle once and showed Kyle and his friends how to climb onto the roof of our home and jump onto the trampoline from up there! I sold the trampoline a few months later. I don't think it was anything against me. I think it is just him being a immature man! I wouldn't worry too much about your GS. You have instilled morals and values in him and he will be just fine. :)

Lynn said...

I'm amazed the father would tell GS to do that. Very childish of him. I'm glad he has the two of you to set him on the right path.

Granny Annie said...

Married or divorced, fathers are going to tell sons about practical jokes and sons are going to try them out. (And not to discriminate, daughters will try a few also.) I believe it is a great sign of a typical wholesome kid and at least he tried it on mom and not the school principal. I don't know where to start the list of pranks my children pulled on me and most of the ideas they came up with on their own. At least the dad didn't tell your GS to put poison in mom's cereal.

Granny Annie said...

I also would like to know just how the dad shared this information. Perhaps this story was learned in an eavesdropping situation and wasn't intended for GS's ears. I've got a story about tracking down my godson and his friend who, at ages 11, built a dry ice bomb and blew up the doghouse. Though they denied it, when I spotted them walking away they were throwing dry ice out of their pockets.

✿ⒹⒺⒺ✿@ A Lapin Life said...

Hi Sandie,

Having three boys myself I'm sure your grandson just thought he was being funny :)

Dee

TARYTERRE said...

I really can't find the humor in this if it was meant to be a joke? Though boys will be boys. I think it was a pretty rotten thing for a father to do, in regards to his son. I'm sure he'll think it's hilarious when he hears about it. The man sounds very IMMATURE if you ask me. Hope the sore throat your grandson had wasn't strep. take care.PS) I'm behind commenting. lots going on here I can't talk about. Take care.

Tracy said...

perhaps he was attempting to create some type of 'bond' between the two households? That was my first thought...it's tough for a kid to live two separate lives and know or wonder or anticipate that it may not be good to talk about either life in the company of the others so by bringing humor into the situation, it may have seemed 'right' in his eyes...just a thought!

sparkle100-havealook.blogspot.com said...

I snagged some funny pictures to my computer.I seen a couple that I can print out on my printer to insert to my G.sons book I am making. He loves humor. I hope you did not mine and also the car key one for
protection. Very good idea.

Sorry about your x son-laws attitude for your Grandson.

I enjoy your blogs. Looks everyone does also.

Happy Monday!