"Life is lived forward, but understood backward. It is not until we are down the road and we stand on the mountain looking back through the valley that we can appreciate the terrain God has allowed us to scale.” Jill Savage

Friday, August 03, 2012

Fun Friday with a little help from my friends.

  THIS IS MY DAUGHTER WHEN SHE SEES A SPIDER!





‎$5.37! 
That's what the kid behind the counter at Taco Bell said to me. 

 
I dug into my pocket and pulled out some lint and two dimes and something that used to be a Jolly Rancher. Having already handed the kid a five-spot, I started to head back out to the truck to grab some change when the kid with the Elmo hairdo said the hardest thing anyone has ever said to me. He said, "It's OK. I'll just give you the senior citizen discount."

I turned to see who he was talking to and then heard the sound of change hitting the counter in front of me. "Only $4.68" he said cheerfully.

I stood there stupefied. I am 56, not even 60 yet? A mere child! Senior citizen?

I took my burrito and walked out to the truck wondering what was wrong with Elmo. Was he blind? As I sat in the truck, my blood began to boil. Old? Me?

I'll show him, I thought. I opened the door and headed back inside. I strode to the counter, and there he was waiting with a smile.   Before I could say a word, he held up something and jingled it in front of me, like I could be that easily distracted! What am I now? A toddler?

"Dude! Can't get too far without your car keys, eh?" I stared with utter disdain at the keys. I began to rationalize in my mind! 

"Leaving keys behind hardly makes a man elderly! It could happen to anyone!"

I turned and headed back to the truck. I slipped the key into the ignition, but it wouldn't turn. What now? I checked my keys and tried another. 

 
Still nothing.

 
That's when I noticed the purple beads hanging from my rear view mirror. I had no purple beads hanging from my rear view mirror.    Then, a few other objects came into focus: The car seat in the back seat. Happy Meal toys spread all over the floorboard. A partially eaten doughnut on the dashboard.   Faster than you can say ginkgo biloba, I flew out of the alien vehicle.

Moments later I was speeding out of the parking lot, relieved to finally be leaving this nightmarish stop in my life. That is when I felt it, deep in the bowels of my stomach: hunger! My stomach growled and churned, and I reached to grab my burrito, only it was nowhere to be found.

I swung the truck around, gathered my courage, and strode back into the restaurant one final time. There Elmo stood, draped in youth and black nail polish. All I could think was, "What is the world coming to?"

All I could say was, "Did I leave my food and drink in here"? 

 
At this point I was ready to ask a Boy Scout to help me back to my vehicle, and then go straight home and apply for Social Security benefits.   Elmo had no clue. I walked back out to the truck, and suddenly a young lad came up and tugged on my jeans to get my attention. He was holding up a drink and a bag. His mother explained, "I think you left this in my truck by mistake."

I took the food and drink from the little boy and sheepishly apologized.
She offered these kind words: "It's OK. My grandfather does stuff like this all the time."

All of this is to explain how I got a ticket doing 85 in a 40 mph zone. 
Yessss, I was racing some punk kid in a Toyota Prius. And no, I told the officer, I'm not too old to be driving this fast.

As I walked in the front door, my wife met me halfway down the hall. I handed her a bag of cold food and a $300 speeding ticket. I promptly sat in my rocking chair and covered up my legs with a blankey.

The good news was I had successfully found my way home.
  Thank you Terri at Coloring Outside the Lines 








 






THOUGHT FOR THE DAY!


I love all my friends here - just wanted to let you know.





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50 comments:

Lisa @ Two Bears Farm said...

No clue on editing the cartoon. I'm not good w/ that sort of stuff.

Love the mom calling back in 5 years. That's me, right now...

Debbie said...

Hahaha! I really enjoyed the story! So far, knock on wood, none of that has happened to me. But when my mom was in her 60s, she got in a wrong car. In her haste to exit the car, she left her purse. Luckily, the young man who owned the car found it and returned it to her the next day. I'm just counting the days until it's my turn. :)

Jill said...

So funny yet true! haha!

Love you to the moon and back too!

Linda O'Connell said...

Sandie, thanks for the chuckles today. A mile is frown turned upside down.My cheeks are cramping from smiling at your funnies.

Kim said...

Laughed out loud all the way through the taco bell story. That will be me, for sure

andy said...

Hahahahah i love the taco bell story! Have a great friday

MadSnapper said...

i just called to join the Don't Give A Crappa sorority, which is the only one i would want to ever join.

Unknown said...

Hmmm I am almost 64.......sure hope that doesn't happen to me! lol

Shelly said...

Great laughs this morning!

Anonymous said...

I think I'm gonna join that sorority...you got the number?

Debbie said...

Very VERY funny story!! I laughed a bit too much in recognition.

And I don't know how to change the wording, but the dinosaurs left behind cracked me up.

Melanie said...

What a funny, funny story!! Yep, I'm right there with your daughter...I hate those creepy things, but you already knew that! :)

Kathy ... aka Nana said...

I laughed out loud at the Taco Bell story ... I know that will be me some day. ha!

I'm mostly known as 'MA' said...

Thanks for all the wonderful SMILES this morning....I'm a senior citizen and I'll be the first to say so...I'm so busy laughing at all the silly things I do, I really am thankful that I've not had a day as bad as that fellow with his take out food though. And I haven't tried to get into someone elss care lately anyway.

Hope your Friday is a fantastic one!

Knitty said...

I am going to email you a suggestion about the cartoon editing. It is too difficult to do here.

Thanks for the laughs!

Miss Debbie said...

Funny senior moments story! :-)

Shanae Branham said...

Great post! I especially love the picture about a grandmother's love.
Hey, I can't seem to find your email. I wanted to get your advice on a blogging question. Could you shoot me a message. I have to run, but will be back this afternoon Alaska time.
Cheers,
Shanae

Paula said...

Hee hee I'm there already so I brazenly ask for the senior discounts. One time I ordered food to take to the ranch for John working, When I got half way to the ranch I realized I had paid and left without the food. I was too embarrased to go back. Like the giraffe picture. I saw them last week for my birthday. My daughters took me through the animal drive-thru park. I think they suspect I'm in my second childhood.

Grammy Goodwill said...

hahahahaha - Great ones today. I love the giraffe picture, but the Taco Bell story made me laugh out loud. By the way, I LOVE senior discounts.

Beth said...

LOL All good ones today!!

Susan said...

Hi Sandie...I want to join that Sorority TODAY....Don't give a CRAPPA. ha ha hahahah Sign me up, girlfriend.

Hilarious post. Loved it and you! Susan

Dolores said...

Oh my, that's the cutest story!!! Love the cute jokes too! I love you to the moon and back too!

Unknown said...

LOL! That story was too funny, still giggling. Thanks' for the laughs today. Always fun to read your Friday funnies :-)

Eva

Susannah said...

The Taco Bell story gave hubby and I some real laughs this morning! That was so good! Miss Chatty...you are so good at this. You can change my mood instantly!

I hope you have a wonderful Friday!

Wanda's Wings said...

Too funny.

TexWisGirl said...

thanks for the chuckles. i didn't mind the one word. :)

Anonymous said...

I definitely needed a laugh right now, thank you.

Southhamsdarling said...

Oh dear Sandie, that was such a funny story, wasn't it?! It just got worse and worse for that poor man! Eeeek!

Unknown said...

im very afrade of snakes. i know they havee place in the world. that place is as far away from me as possible lol

Granny Annie said...

That mom is nuts if she thinks her kids are going to let her use the phone in five years!

Great post Sandie!

ruthie said...

Thanks again for the laughs!!!Love it and I look forward to it!

Lois Christensen said...

That first cartoon is so my daughter! Love the story of the forgetful man! Too funny!

Unknown said...

Sandie this was such a delightful entry, one I bet most everybody can relate too. I know I can. It was amusing to read but as I recall, wasn't that amusing the first time something similar happened to me. When my son offered me the line "You're not older Moms, just more seasoned," I grabbed it. LOL
You take care and thank you so much for visiting my Story journal.

Ann said...

"The world can be amazing when you're slightly strange." I love it, I think that's my new motto :)

jp@A Green Ridge said...

Like, Lisa, I love the one where the mom wants them to call back in 5...years...that is! It sounds like my youngest stepdaughter with her three girls...now she just yells at them while she's on the phone!!!...:)JP

Rob-bear said...

I haven't had the same kind of "senior moments" as your gent with the burrito and the $300.00 speeding ticket. But then I haven't been a senior that long.

And now I understand why the world is so amazing.

Hope you have a great weekend!

~Lavender Dreamer~ said...

We both enjoyed this post! And it's me with a blankey...in my recliner! heehee! What a fun story!

Dee said...

I am smiling and chuckling at the same time...the taco bell story is a hoot.

Marie said...

Really cute stuff Sandie! That story had me rolling with laughter! Happy weekend!

Linda @ A La Carte said...

That story cracked me up! Gosh its so much 'fun' to get old!! Hugs, Linda

Jackie said...

Smilin'....big time!!
Love this!

renae said...

hilarious but true! o my gawsh! too funny - I split at reading 'Don't Give a Krappa' - LOL!!!

love it all every week, every week!

love to you, Sandie!
Renae

renae said...

i keep forgetting to tell you that I love the Grandmother thought at the very beginning of your blog! that's is nice!

Mary said...

Hahhahaa a good laugh...for old guy at 56...haahha. I love you to the moon and back, too.

Coloring Outside the Lines said...

Ok, I can start my day now I have had my daily Chatty Crone Chuckles! :)
Have a great weekend girl!

Suzan said...

Goodness gracious!! I have done that - left my keys at the fast food counter, then had to go back because I left my drink-- the sad part is - I did that 20 years ago!!
It's not the Golden Years!! It's the Rusty Years :-{{

Sweet Tea said...

LOL!!
These tickle my funny bone!

TARYTERRE said...

Your post brought me some smiles on this rainy evening.Take care.

larkswing said...

The giraffe cartoon made me snort! Our vacation to the beach was to my mother in law's vacation house. An old Jim Walter house, couple blocks from the beach. We stay downstairs where it was cinder blocked in, but not real crack free - so spiders tend to be found in corners and behind curtains. Until we spray. My 16 year old was acting like that giraffe. He was so funny!

Anonymous said...

Laughing my head off about the guy in the wrong car and the keys. Funny. I have to share this with you.

I was not even 60 when I got into a car on the passenger side from shopping. I opened the door. Threw in my parcles in the back and then turned to the so called hubby next to me. Saying. Sorry I am late hon but what a time at the cashier with the gal ahead of me. Then I let out a scream. Oh my gosh. I am in the wrong car. This car door was unlocked of course but I never took really any notice as I thought it was my hubby sitting in it and it was the same station wagon as ours and I thought back then it was our station wagon. Same colour and inside interior.

I soon grabbed my bags and did I flee.

He was laughing so hard the man. I was then 50 years old.

Anyhow. I enjoyed your pst as usual.

Have a good day .