For 2016

"Life is lived forward, but understood backward. It is not until we are down the road and we stand on the mountain looking back through the valley that we can appreciate the terrain God has allowed us to scale.” Jill Savage

Friday, November 30, 2012

Fun Friday with a little help from my friends.






An old man wanted to plant a tomato garden but it was difficult work as the ground was hard.
His only son, Vincent, who used to help him was in prison.
The old man wrote a letter to his son:

Dear Vincent

I am feeling sad because I won't be able to plant my tomato garden this year.
I'm too old already.
I know if you were here, you would happily dig the plot for me like in the old days.
Love ~ Papa
A few days later, he received a letter from his son.

Dear Papa,

Don't dig up that garden.  That's where the bodies are buried.
Love ~ Vinnie

At 4 am the next morning, FBI agents and police arrived and dug up the entire area without finding any bodies.
They apologized to the old man and left.
That day, he received another letter from his son:

Dear Papa,
Go ahead and plant the tomatoes now. That's the best I could do under the circumstances.
Love you ~ Vinnie 
(Thanks Sharon)




Drinking and Driving
 
I would like to share an experience with you about drinking and driving.
 
As you well know, some of us have been lucky not to have had brushes with the authorities on our way home from the various social sessions over the years.
 
A couple of nights ago, I was out for a few drinks with some friends and had a few too many beers and then topped it off with a margarita . Not a good idea.
 
Knowing full well I was at least slightly over the limit, I did something I've never done before: I took a taxi home.
 
Sure enough I passed a police road block but because it was a taxi, they waved it past.
 
I arrived home safely without incident, which was a real surprise.
 
I have never driven a taxi before and am not sure where I got it. 

 

Potato Prostitute
 
Two little potatoes are standing on the street corner. 


One is a prostitute..

How can you tell which one is the prostitute?

Photobucket
    

It's the one with the little sticker that says...


I - DA - HO
 

(Thank you Fran).

A woman walked into the kitchen to find her Husband stalking around with a fly swatter.

"What are you doing?"  She asked.

"Hunting Flies" He responded.

"Oh. ! Killing any?" She asked.

"Yep, 3 males, 2 Females," he replied.

Intrigued, she asked. "How can you tell them apart?"

He responded, "3 were on a beer can, 2 were on the phone."
(Thank you Jerry at As the CrackerHead Crumbles)





THOUGHT FOR THE DAY:


“As you grow older, you will discover that you have two hands, 
one for helping yourself, 
the other for helping others.”  
Audrey Hepburn

x_3bb4e489

52 comments:

I'm mostly known as 'MA' said...

How cute to see Santa flying across your blog this morning! Thanks for the many smiles to start the day!
Hope your Friday is a fantastic one!

Jeanie said...

I hope you have a great Friday Sandie. Thanks for starting mine out with some fun.

Shelly said...

A merry heart does good like a medicine, and I've had a great dose this morning- thank you!

Walking on Sunshine said...

These are hysterical. Love the taxi driver one! Hope you're having a good Friday!

GrammyK said...

I LOVE the tomato garden funny!! One of my very favorites that I like to tell at garden planting time (there's always somebody who hasn't heard it!!). Ha Ha!!

Have a GREAT weekend!! <3

Laurie said...

these were the BEST!!!!! The snow man pooping I'm saving for my grandson, he's just gonna split when he see's this one!

jack69 said...

You are card. What a collection to keep me healthy. I laughed a lot. Love my man Vinnie!!!!
very good ending with the two hands. Love from here
Sherry & jack

Kim said...

LOL The tomato garden and the taxi were priceless! Have a great day.

Debbie said...

I just laughed all the way through this one! I do not have a favorite this week. Usually I can pick one.

And thanks a lot Miss Sandie. I shall never be able to eat a soft serve ice cream cone again. LOL

Renae said...

morning Ms. Crone! hello! funny funny funny. love to come here and laugh each friday. i know i can count on you each time. the first time i ever saw your blog was on a friday and i thought your daily posts would always be funnny. interesting, huh?

Comfypjs said...

These Friday posts always cheer me up! Thanks for the laugh :D

Wanda's Wings said...

Smile.

TexWisGirl said...

i've read that garden one before. really like it. :)

barbara l. hale said...

LOL. Thanks for the chuckles! Very much appreciated on this grey Friday.

Angela said...

Love the Santa riding through your blog! Too cute! Loved the garden story! That was hilarious! Makes you wonder if that could really happen.

Happy Fun Friday!
Angela

Helen said...

Love it!

Ms. A said...

I love that garden story!

Can you believe today is the last day of November... ALREADY? Yikes, time is flying!

Happy weekend!

Susannah said...

Miss Chatty...these are so funny .....can not wait for hubby to get gome and he can read them. You are priceless!

Optimistic Existentialist said...

Thank you for visiting my blog!! I loved these stories! Especialy the one with Vinnie. I love your blog and I am now a new follower :)

Lisa @ Two Bears Farm said...

Ha, the tomato joke is a good one!

Kerrie said...

Oh Wow! I love all the animated Christmas things you have on your blog... flashing lights, snowflakes falling, snowman waving and Santa with his sleigh zooming across the screen. Pretty darn clever if you ask me! I love the letter to the father! Clever hey. I have read that before, but it never gets boring. I still smile each time I read it. Lots of other great Friday's funnies too! Have a great weekend. xOx

Marsha @Spots and Wrinkles said...

Chatty,
You are SUCH a pistol!
glad you got home safe and sound.

Sr. Ann Marie Slavin said...

Love those jokes! I'm going out to dinner with a friend tonight and plan to entertain her with them!

Cheri said...

When I read the first one I laughed and laughed and then each of the other ones made me laugh just as much...good ones, Sandie.

barbara woods said...

you made me smile thanks

Ginny said...

My favorites are the flies and the vegetable garden, TOO funny!!! Laughing is so very important to me now and I know I can always count on you for that!!! How you have a great weekend, Sandie!

Gloria Hood said...

Thanks for all the grins today Sandie!

Ann said...

Lots of good laughs here today. You've got me giggling up a storm here

Arkansas Patti said...

Loved them all but especially the taxi. Did not see that coming. Thanks for the chuckles.

Paula said...

Some of them I've read before but still enjoy. Like those snowmen at top and like the I-Da-Ho potato.

DearHelenHartman said...

Bwahahahaha Thanks for the laugh tonight. I needed a little Christmas cheer.

SweetMarie said...

You've got us in tears! Hubby and I just read these together and I have tears running down my face from laughing so hard! thank you!
hugs,
Marie

Miss Debbie said...

Cute stuff!!

Kathy ... aka Nana said...

Hilarious! And hey, I read them on Friday (ok, Friday evening) instead of Saturday morning like usual. ha!

Karen Lange said...

Sandie,
You always make me smile! Thanks for sharing these with us. I think my favorite is the one about the tomato garden. :)
Have a great weekend,
Karen

Annie said...

So funny. I'm totally slap happy in California.

Susan said...

ha ha ha haha Sandie. Didn't get to read this until 20 minutes beforeo 11 p.m. It was just as hilarious as if it were early morning. Great job! Susan

Sue said...

the first cartoon was priceless....and the planing tomatoes story....we always use to say that was my father in law....He planted tomatoes along his fence until the day he died at 89...we always wondered why he never used that story....

That corgi :) said...

love your new blog look Sandie! So festive!! LOL with the joke about the tomato garden being dug! All great ones! Have a great weekend!

betty

Dar said...

Loved the snowman, timing is everything. And gotta love the taters, the flies, and the hands at the end. Good boy, that Vinnie. You made my day.
Blessings

SavannahGranny said...

I loved all the stories. Thanks for the laughs. Love, love, love the Santa and sleigh.
Merry Christmas

Betsy Adams said...

Funny ones, Sandie. Thanks... I loved the 'digging' one --and I laughed outloud at the Idaho one....
Hugs,
Betsy

Pondside said...

I just read these aloud to The Great Dane - we're both still chuckling.

Marydon said...

You will never EVER know how badly I needed this wonderful humor this AM, sweet Sandie. You always brighten my day ... been a VERY trying time lately. TY for just being you.

TTFN ~
MERRY CHRISTMAS ~
Hugs,
Marydon

Sarah (Nikki) said...

I needed your jokes and you never fail to deliver. Love the snowmen at the top and the Vinnie in prison the most.
Hugs to you chatty girl.....have a great Saturday out there....and know in your heart...to me....you totally rock.

nancygrayce said...

I don't know where you get all your animations, but I love them! You started my Saturday morning with a laugh! Thanks!

Love the potato joke!

My Journey With Candida said...

LOL I love how the ole guy got his tomato garden dug up. I guess whatever works!

Auntie sezzzzzz... said...

Oh that first cartoon!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Granny Annie said...

Taking the taxi home!!!! Gotta share that on my facebook.

Debby@Just Breathe said...

Love the snowmen!!!!

Linda @ A La Carte said...

The Taxi one is my favorite this time!

hugs, Linda

mare ball said...

the snowmen droppings is a hoot! And the tomato garden. So funny! I'm on jury duty...sitting and waiting to be called, or not called...and reading your blog is helping pass the time!