"Life is lived forward, but understood backward. It is not until we are down the road and we stand on the mountain looking back through the valley that we can appreciate the terrain God has allowed us to scale.” Jill Savage

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Just can't get away without one long Blog a week - this is it - complete with song (lol).

I read some one's Blog the other day. One day it listed one philosophical idea and the next day it listed a completely opposite philosophy. I marveled how one person could think such totally different things yet like them both.

One was a quote:
"Seek those who find your road agreeable,
your personality and mind stimulating,
your philosophy acceptable,
and your experience helpful.
Let those who do not,
seek their own kind

One was a song and I sent the you tube for it below, but here is the address.

I thought the two together were oxymoron's. Of course I identified with the song.

The first seemed like it was the philosophy of someone who lived inside a box. Very limited liking only their own kind. I remember when my grandson was 2 and he was so different. It was very hard for him to live inside the box of other 2 years and the box his teacher 'thought' he should be in. In this case which was extreme, she kept telling him if he didn't change he wouldn't have any friends. This bothered him and I, with every one's approval, I found the best school in the world - it was Jewish and we're not, but it was wonderful. Taught great family and personal values, he was accepted, and got what he needed to move on.

I also see how being abused makes you out of the box with people who aren't. My friend who was abused physically as a child is getting a divorce from her husband of 25 years. Why, he and his teenage son got into a shouting match and the father grabbed him and pushed him against the wall. First time ever. And yes there were other issues between the couple anyway and this was a good time to break with a reason. However, she had stated at the beginning - no abuse at all will be tolerated. So while her son understands the daughter wasn't home. She didn't see dad get so mad. So she's mad at the mom. Maybe most people could accept it - once at least - she could not. So whose in a box? Why do we get in boxes or out of boxes anyway? Can you move from one box to another?

Then my grandson said last night - we were out to dinner - now he's a real 'feeling' kind of guy - "Grandma, whenever I see a family come in with a dad, I feel sad." You have to know his dad. He hasn't even called in a month . . . anyway, I said in summary - it's okay to feel sad. You might always feel a little sad (I thought to myself the Bible says we sometimes pay for the sins of our parents). Anyway I didn't make a big deal out of it, yet I let him have his feelings. See, his box will be different then kids who have fathers, but his box will be filled with love of family and friends. He'll always have a tiny scar from his dad. I can't change that. I can help him to accept it and deal with it.

We all have our boxes and the question I am wondering is, if we have to stay with people with like boxes or can we expand our hearts and friendships to people who have different boxes?

Now the song is about the world being so beautiful and everything in it - it's so freeing and light. Makes you feel good and love life. Outside the box thinkers and feelers for sure. It makes you feel light and happy. Makes you appreciate life. I wish I could feel that way all the time. Of course - it showed things in the world not really relationships, but I really liked it.

More and more I have come to the belief and understanding that we have mixtures of many different things and for many different reasons and circumstances in our lives and that makes up our box. The more I thought about about two different point of views at the same time, the more I understood. Having both points of view from the same writer about life, while being an oxymoron, is also the very definition of life. I used to be such a black or white thinker myself years ago. Now I'm a 'gray' thinker. I believe I try to let people be the way they are as much as possible, as long as I don't get hurt in the process. I certainly try to understand every one's point of view!
I believe ~

Life is like music; it must be composed by ear, feeling, and instinct, not by rule." – Samuel Butler
From Daily Celebrations:

""Be yourself, that's all there is of you." ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson "A friend is a person with whom I may be sincere," Emerson believed, "Before him, I may think aloud."

Emerson always celebrated the individual spirit. He believed in the power and truth of self-examination and the unending beauty of nature and mankind.

"In life--the joy, loss, and grace of life-- there is higher knowledge and revelation in all things."

"A chief event of life is the day in which we have encountered a mind that startled us," he wrote."



Be yourself in all things and let someone or something startle you! So whether you are in the box, outside the box, or the box itself - go ahead and live live to the fullest.
Chatty

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