Difficult times have helped me to understand better than before how infinitely rich and beautiful life is in every way, and that so many things that one goes worrying about are of no importance whatsoever."– Isak Denison
That is definitely true for me whether in Aruba or at home.
One of the difficulties I've had in life is love.
All I saw in Aruba, including my own daughter was love. New love, weddings, anniversaries, and old love. There were some young children there, not many. There were some singles groups of both men and women, but not many. I'm kind of a people watcher so it was quite interesting to me. I wondered how many of these young couples would make it to the end together. I wondered what the secret was to some of these oldies but goodies and how they seemed to have made it.
One day as I lay poolside I saw a group of four single women meet four single men flirting. The women were all different (one independent, one crass, one younger woman looking for a man, and one heavy girl seemingly unself confident) and I wondered how they ended up as a group of friends. The four men seemed more similar in nature. Now the women you could tell were not a bonded group. The men were like blood brothers. The independent and heavy set girl dot out of the pool and decided to go up to their rooms. Finally the other two left and the men were alone.
The men stayed at the pool and went over to the pool bar. They were loud and talked crass about the women who left. Making fun of them. If it had gone the other way and they had connected for a day or two I'm sure the conversation would have been different, but I bet they would have been talked about in a different yet crass way. These men were like blood brothers -one for all and all for one. Now part of it was show I know and pride. But I bet the men stayed friends and I wonder if the woman did?
I must admit the women were not like that at all. Why can't we women be steadfast like men?
Then I started looking at some of the older couples and wondered what makes love last? Not the have to kind of love or the love of convenience. Love where you put yourself out for the other one even if it hurts. Love where you are genuinely interested in one another. Love that isn't selfish. Love that isn't dependent on some one's mood. I mean do they just pick 'right' from the beginning? Is it something learned along the way? Luck? Hard work? Or is love more than a description.
Now I saw fat people, thin ones, bald ones, ugly ones as well as good looking people in love. It can't be all about looks either.
What is love then?
And what about people who are married and not in love? I saw that as well there. How does that happen? Were they in love once and lost it or never in love at all? Love is hard.
Anyway, I do feel all the difficult times in my life has made be better understand and appreciate the beauty in life. To make it more personal I feel all the difficulty in my life with the 'love issues' have made me more appreciative and more understanding.
Worrying doesn't help. So why do we worry? Habit?