The struggle of today, is not altogether for today–it is for a vast future also”. Abraham Lincoln
Thanks Jill from Chillin With Jill. ' I believe what we do each day is important.' Each choice. Each decision.
This is one of my all time favorite quotes:
'Perhaps then someday far in the future, you will gradually without even noticing it, live your way into the answer.' Rainer Maria Rilke
I talked to my sister the other day. She believes I'm Pollyanna. She said she thinks of me like a giant teddy bear that tries to believe the best in people. Now what she really meant and was saying so sweetly was that she thinks I'm naive. My daughter thinks I'm naive too.
First of all - I think the one difference is - they are around 35 (yes my sister is 35 and my daughter will be in Feb.) and I'm almost 60. I know they can't believe it, but I used to be more like them when I was younger. I used to fight for justice. I tried to help people everyone even when they didn't want help. I rebelled. I fought for truth. I tried to fix things. Everything was important to me.
Now, not so much, I believe that time and experiences changed me.
I think the younger you are the more important things are to you. The more you fight for your principals and values. Then when you get a little older you get a little tired of fighting and working so hard. You start to analyze what is really important in the time that is left. You start to let more things go. Things that were once so important aren't so important anymore. I think it puts you at a crossroads and this is when you can become bitter or better. Mid-life time...
I remember my mom - she would always try to maintain peace. 'Blessed are the peacemakers for they shall inherit the earth' . . . She would say to me, "Sandie, if your dad tells you the moon is purple, say okay dad. Then go and believe what you want." I'd say, "But mom - I can't do that - that's a lie - the moon isn't purple!"
Now I get it!!!!!!! The moon could be any color now. It is not that important!!! I don't care what color OTHERS think the moon is - I'm strong enough to know in my head what color it is. No one can take that from me anymore. I stand firm and strong. I used to be like Don Quixote trying to slay windmills that only existed in my mind, but I didn't know that then, I thought they did exist. And no one could tell me anything different. And I probably needed to go through that period to become me today...
What I am saying is - the answers to life may come after you have lived your life out a little bit. After you have put some miles on. You have to go thru a lot of different things in life to grow. You may not know the answers when you are young, but as you mature - you get the answers.
Maybe when you get to be older - you have lived your way to the answers of who you are ...of life and maybe, maybe I've made my way to teddy bear status! I've always loved and wanted to be like Pooh bear! (I used to be more like Rabbit.) Pooh's slow. He smells the honey/roses. He has friends. He Is loved. He's happy. Maybe he's not the brightest bulb - but then again maybe he is. . .
My two girls both try hard in life to do the right thing. I love them both dearly. I'm really proud of them both. Both have tremendous work ahead of them in their life. They struggle with decisions, they work hard at home and at their jobs, and getting things right is important to them. I was that way too. And they have a lot of time left to evolve and I wonder what they will be like in 25 years?
Me - I am naive - I want to believe the best - it's my choice these days. I could chose to be more 'street smart' then they think I am, but I like being this way. It's so much nicer for me and easier. It's hard to always be thinking! I just really want to play now-a-days.
'Perhaps then someday far in the future, you will gradually without even noticing it, live your way into the answer.' Rainer Maria Rilke
I talked to my sister the other day. She believes I'm Pollyanna. She said she thinks of me like a giant teddy bear that tries to believe the best in people. Now what she really meant and was saying so sweetly was that she thinks I'm naive. My daughter thinks I'm naive too.
First of all - I think the one difference is - they are around 35 (yes my sister is 35 and my daughter will be in Feb.) and I'm almost 60. I know they can't believe it, but I used to be more like them when I was younger. I used to fight for justice. I tried to help people everyone even when they didn't want help. I rebelled. I fought for truth. I tried to fix things. Everything was important to me.
Now, not so much, I believe that time and experiences changed me.
I think the younger you are the more important things are to you. The more you fight for your principals and values. Then when you get a little older you get a little tired of fighting and working so hard. You start to analyze what is really important in the time that is left. You start to let more things go. Things that were once so important aren't so important anymore. I think it puts you at a crossroads and this is when you can become bitter or better. Mid-life time...
I've discovered that my time is much more valuable then it ever was.
I don't want to waste any of it!
I don't want to waste any of it!
I remember my mom - she would always try to maintain peace. 'Blessed are the peacemakers for they shall inherit the earth' . . . She would say to me, "Sandie, if your dad tells you the moon is purple, say okay dad. Then go and believe what you want." I'd say, "But mom - I can't do that - that's a lie - the moon isn't purple!"
Now I get it!!!!!!! The moon could be any color now. It is not that important!!! I don't care what color OTHERS think the moon is - I'm strong enough to know in my head what color it is. No one can take that from me anymore. I stand firm and strong. I used to be like Don Quixote trying to slay windmills that only existed in my mind, but I didn't know that then, I thought they did exist. And no one could tell me anything different. And I probably needed to go through that period to become me today...
What I am saying is - the answers to life may come after you have lived your life out a little bit. After you have put some miles on. You have to go thru a lot of different things in life to grow. You may not know the answers when you are young, but as you mature - you get the answers.
Maybe when you get to be older - you have lived your way to the answers of who you are ...of life and maybe, maybe I've made my way to teddy bear status! I've always loved and wanted to be like Pooh bear! (I used to be more like Rabbit.) Pooh's slow. He smells the honey/roses. He has friends. He Is loved. He's happy. Maybe he's not the brightest bulb - but then again maybe he is. . .
My two girls both try hard in life to do the right thing. I love them both dearly. I'm really proud of them both. Both have tremendous work ahead of them in their life. They struggle with decisions, they work hard at home and at their jobs, and getting things right is important to them. I was that way too. And they have a lot of time left to evolve and I wonder what they will be like in 25 years?
Me - I am naive - I want to believe the best - it's my choice these days. I could chose to be more 'street smart' then they think I am, but I like being this way. It's so much nicer for me and easier. It's hard to always be thinking! I just really want to play now-a-days.
Love you C and K! Very much. Happy growing to you both!
Mom/sister/friend.
Sandie
Mom/sister/friend.
Sandie
54 comments:
This is an awesome post, my friend! I do believe we "get things" better as we get older....
This is one of the best I have read, Sandie. My sons had opposite personalities. I could tell one to do something on a job. He would say Yes sir, then go do what he wanted to. The other would argue until he was blue in the face.
I was more like the first. Yes dad!
Love it and the quotes are tops!!
Love from NC
I read this with an open heart and I'll go back and read it again. Sometimes it's hard for me to explain to others why I am the way I am...think the way I do but you explained it so well. I just don't worry about some things any more. I pray about them and let God work on the hard stuff. I don't watch much news and NO commercial TV any more. I like to see the beauty and joy in life. I have had the hard stuff...and I'm sure I will have more in the future but God will help me when that time comes. I like this quote in your post, 'this is when you can become bitter or better.' I want to be bettter...and FEEL better! Sweet hugs! Your slightly 'older' friend, Diane
Nice post, Sandie. And I totally believe that first quotation. And hopefully we become more settled in our principles as we get older, not less. And I agree that we tend to slough off the superfluous and try to stick with what's really important. And I so agree with Lavender Dreamer.
I've been called naive too. But it is a choice I've made. I'd rather see the good than to dwell on the nasty. Too many are missing out on the important things in life. What a waste. Hope your Thursday is a wonderful one!
my mother was like your mother, but way back when, i called her a rug, whatever anyone said or did it was ok with her, she was always happy and always let everyone have their way because it was the way she was. God gave her to daddy because daddy wanted to rule and she did not mind be ruled. i was like daddy, i wanted to rule so we butted heads while poor mother tried to get along with both of us.
this was a good post.
Nice post Sandie. I love all of the quotes. very meaningful.
I want to play too and I think we deserve it! Our priorities change and we also realize we can't change the world. As much as we want to pass on our learned experieces to our children, just like us they have to live and learn. However, I don't think I am naive like I was when I was younger. Debby xoxo
Wise words, Sandie. Wise words. Life is the greatest teacher, that's for sure.
I want to shout out to my adult kids what's really important in life and what's not but I can't. They must learn on their own. They wouldn't listen to me anyway. ha haha
Yes, life will teach the lessons that need to be learned. Of course, for me, behind "life" is "God." He's the best teacher of all and He's a strict disciplinarian!
Take care and thanks for sharing your thoughts on life. Susan
You are wiser than you give yourself credit for. You have lots of wisdom, Sandie, and I do believe this comes with experience and age. Like you...some things are just not as important as they once were.
I so enjoyed reading this post...and I agree wholeheartedly...it doesn't matter what color someone else thinks the moon is..."to thine own self be true"....
Sandie,I always come away from Miz Chatty Crone,with great thoughts in my head.Thanks,I always enjoy your sharing!
I am 60 and I have taken a long time getting he and some days I still find myself fighting for right, but mostly, I've accepted that life is what it is......I used to have a friend that said all the time " what is, is". And I'd get so mad, but now I understand!
This is a great post!
At least you're not sitting around obsessing about every little thing, right?!
Sandie this is a great post! Tilting at windmills is for the young! Me I'm ready to enjoy what time I have left. My energies are best directed toward positive things. Pick you battles I always say! Love you and I'm a Pollyanna right there with you!
hugs, LInda
1 Corinthians 13:11
"When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child; but when I became a man, I put away childish things."
What you posted today is exactly where I am in life as well. People can call it whatever they want but I choose to believe it is the road to maturity.
a great post, sandie. :)
You are quite the thinker, my friend. Very good thoughts and thank you for sharing them with us. I'm with you and the 1 Corinthians verse above. I think it's okay to be a Pollyanna in a world of hard hearted Aunt Pollys.
You are so right Sandie! It takes a lot of effort and wasted time to fight everything all the time. Things start to roll off a little more as you age. Stress is a killer and who needs it. I LOVE Pollyanna - you should take that as a compliment to your soul and your unfailing faith. Amen sister!
Love that first saying so true! Happy Thursday! !!!
Well written Sandie.
That was beautiful. Unfailing faith says it all.
Amen.
Loves To You
Carol Ann
Of the Winnie the Pooh characters, I love Eeyore but I have been told I am more like Tigger. hahahaha. Winnie is cute and cuddly. Thanks for sharing a heart-felt wisdom. We older ones need to do that more often.
I'm with you! Going on 65 here and I would rathur go with the flow!
Great words today, and so true. And I love Whinnie the Pooh, he's so cute!!
I'm almost 60 and I agree with you Sandie that our time is too precious to spend it any other way that enjoy every moment and let go of any bad "baggage."
My mother, well...was ill all my life but now my Sister & I are BEST friends and a lot alike in man, many ways!...:)JP
Wonderful post Sandi!
I think I may be just the opposite. What used to be "no big deal" has become an insurmountable "big deal" and my brain never shuts off thinking about it and trying to fix it. I do believe I "get it" I just believe I no have control over it, but refuse to let it go.
It's so true, all of it. They young are full of energy and new to the old problems of the world. One person can't change much, but we don't know that in the beginning. I've enjoyed the letting go of the fight...I just want peace now, too. I want to laugh and share and enjoy. And not contribute to any more problems. Only God can fix the world.
my husband and I talk about this topic sometimes...when we realize how different we raised our first 4 kids..everything was so important and was going to have total influence on the rest of their lives....with the younger 4 we see how much of that stuff we thought was so important really doesn't even matter...doing the best you can with 100% effort is about all that matters!
What a great post and so well thought out.
An amazing and onspiring post...It is funny hpw we try and maybe mellow. I'm glad that happens. It's an easier way to move in the world. Higs to you special friend..
I like the quote. I agree with you about the fighting. I think the older we get we learn the art of choosing our battles and let go of the silly stuff that really isn't all that big of a deal
I love the Rilke quote and it's just what my pastor was saying to me the other day. I have been called naive too by some who I know love me dearly. I simply refuse to see the glass half empty when it is just as easily half full. Enjoyed this, Sandie.
Blessings~
Very well said-big smiles:@)
This is a fabulous post! You express yourself so well. When I was a kid I wasn't heard. My dad was the boss and I didn't like a lot of what he had to say, but my thoughts didn't matter so I was grounded a lot. LOL
My mom just did whatever made him happy and it made me really mad. I'm over it now. I like being happy, but yet I can't stop worrying. Especially now when we have someone that wants to take our country and our children's freedom!
Fantastic, my friend! *HUGS*
Love the quote!!!
I'll say it again...I sure love visiting at your place...makes my day!
We do get wiser as we age. No need in trying to tell the young ones what you've learn, they won't understand until they have lived it.
Excellent post today. I can so relate to this. Few people ever let the other person win just because they have to prove their point. I agree, what is, is, why debate?
I would stand and cheer, but I'm too fifty to do much cheering these days. Instead, I do more sitting there and nodding.
I'm nodding.
I was surprised to learn that I kind of like aging a little bit. 35 was hard. I was a solider and crusader. I did an awful lot of thinking too.
Today, I'm more like you and getting more mellow each day.
I feel the same way. My little sister is two years older than my son...and four years older than my daughter! Well, they just can not understand why I do not want to run any meetings any more or head up committees or speak my peace !I'm older and now I want to HAVE FUN and do the things I've always wanted to do and let the young ones take over. I don't care....ho hum. No argument from me!
Hi Sandy- I came over from Ann's Scrap and Edit. I agree with you about perhaps appearing naive. I'm choosing to write cozy mysteries, not because I deny that sex and violence exist. Mostly, I've just had enough of all that.
HI Sandie, I don't think you are naive at all... You just choose to take the positive road... You now are the peacemaker... You choose to believe in the best in people. I think most of us --as we age and experience life---'mellow' out knowing what is really important in life...Whether the moon is purple or not is truly not important.... The 35 year olders will learn that as they GROW and AGE.
Hugs,
Betsy
Wonderfully written, Sandie!
At 62, I’m still tilting at windmills ... and more often than not, mentally exhausting myself. You’ve given me something to ponder.
Hugs,
Myra
I happen to love you just exactly the way you are. Nieve? Wow..maybe we both are. Right now I am fending off anything negative and it's not easy.
I am just so glad you are in my life, Sandie!
I don't think you are naive, Sandie; I think you are wise. You could choose to take on injustice and fight for things like you might have when you were younger, but you are wiser these days to choose to live out how many more years you have the way you want to. I think that takes wisdom to come to that conclusion. I think that helps you have a more content,peaceful life too!
betty
I enjoyed your thoughts, Sandie, can you hear me cheering you on?! I used to think I needed to convince everyone to think like me, but I've become more accepting of the beauty of "difference" among people. Yep, I think it's an "age" thang and realizing how boring it would be if everyone thought the same way about everything.
I like this entry because we have to think about things!
Thank you dear!
Kiss
BShell/Isabel
LOL Good Luck with kids. Knowing you, you probably volunteered. It is not like you not to.
The leaning over scene, my sons always thinks that I am over protective. I say you cannot be ever overprotective.
I believe/know that we become wiser and more wonderful as we grow older...thank God...I was very naive as a youngster. Just reading this post proves that you have :)
Winnie the Pooh is one smart bear! Love your shares!
What a great post Sandie. I still find myself fighting some battles but I have slowed down a lot from my younger days.
I love the Winnie the Pooh quote!
Sandie,
You express yourself so beautifully! And you sound like you have made peace with yourself and your life. I am so glad to be getting to know you.
Hugs,
charlotte
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