The Boomer Generation is not his favorite generation. We're old. I do wonder at times how serious he is about what he says because I know he's a kidder too and likes to get me going, but I still feel there are some true feelings about our generation going on inside his head.
I also know he loves us very much, so don't get me wrong here, but I don't think he sees us as valuable members of today's society. Personally, I bet there are a lot of those feelings going on.
How was I so valuable at one time and not so valuable now? I got old. If he wants advice, he said he will ask us for it. Our advice is outdated. They are the generation who goes to AI to get advice.
It's a real different world out there now.
It hurts because I spent about 20 years of my life raising him, gladly. He lived with us almost since the day he was born. I quit my job to take care of him. I watched him every day, so his mom could work and take care of the financials and of course be a great mom too. I knew he wasn't my son, but he was more than a grandson. I think that is why it is so hard now. I feel like I don't have a place in his life. D
I will admit it is my issue too. It's hard to let go. I know you have to do it. They are adults now, with their own lives. However, you get pushed farther and farther away and it's hard to feel useful anymore. It's my pride too, but I don't think anyone wants to become old and not needed anymore.
You know society is that way now too. Ever see the Progressive Commercials - "Not Becoming Like Your Parents"? It is a subliminal parody of the young who act like their parents. It is saying go to Progressive - is a new type of insurance - and don't be like your parents who don't have Progressive Insurance. Did you catch the meaning of what they are saying? You don't want to be old like your parents.
They just had a baby; do you know when they left the hospital - they had to sign a paper talking about the sleeping habits for the baby. They had to sign no blankets, no letting the baby sleep with them and things like that - which I can understand for SIDS.
But they also had a talk about 'old people' and babies. They were warned that old people get more stressed with age and when they watch the baby, they might be tempted to shake them to get them to stop crying!!! Or they might let the baby cry too long!!! They may feed them wrong and the baby may choke!!! Can you believe that?
Well, I am done venting for the day, but I am going to write more about this the next couple of weeks.
Love, Chatty
25 comments:
Lately I have been saying I am older...not getting old. Sometimes I too feel like we are part of the throw away society now. Its a shame because we are all so wiser than the young kiddos. But you are right, they can go to their computers for advise...but is that advise always right? Janice
I hate those progressive commercials.
For some reason that generation feels like all their troubles are because of boomers. They have been spoiled and need to blame someone for any issues they have.
Shame on that hospital!!!! When you see on the news about A shaken or murdered child it is not a boomer. It is them!
Ohh I could go on but I will not!
Cathy
I think they stop interacting with us so much is because it's nature's way of separating us...gradually...so it'll hurt them and us... less when we...leave. Yes, it's really hard to be forgotten, pushed aside for someone more hip, but it's just Mother Nature's way.
I hate it, as well.
Try to enjoy what we have now....
big hug
Donna
One of our grandsons has trouble understanding the Baby boomer age. Only difference, he makes us laugh so much at some of the things he says. He is super smart, but I always tell him he lacks common sense. It's a joke around here. Makes me sad Sandie that you might feel ignored...Maybe a good talk with him sharing your feelings would be good. Those commercials: they too make me laugh. If the Gen Z's only knew all that we know, the world would be much better. Wow...the hospital is pretty strict. You are important and you are loved...
No matter what they say, our generation was a great one! We respected those older than us, and didn't question their wise words. Now it's all changed an they don't give us credit for much at all, Still we love them with all we have ! Don't get discouraged, they too will grow old one day!
Wow. Well, ageism is certainly a thing. And you're right about those insurance ads, talk about stereotyping! I could generally bash on the 20-somethings as well.
That's very sad and I'm sorry you're feeling that way. But I know it happens. Yes, I know those Progressive commercials and I hate them!
I like that saying - you are as old as you feel. I hope you feel very well indeed.
Amalia
xo
Yikes, I can't believe the hospital made them sign that about being careful about leaving their baby with older people. That is infuriating! How do they think the current and younger generation even made it to adulthood in the first place? Because those of us in the older generation were smart enough and had common sense about how to take care of babies and children and teens and helped them to become independent and strong and intelligent human beings. Shaking babies? That's not something that people of our generation did...it's the younger, immature, self-centered and entitled spoiled generation that doesn't know how to handle a crying baby because the baby gets in their way or frustrates them because they don't know how to take care of it! Crazy! I know I remember when I thought I knew more than my mother did, but the older I got, the wiser she became in my mind and eyes. I truly wish we could bring back our parents and grandparents and as a mature adult sit down and listen to what they had to say, and write down their stories and wisdom. We were too busy making our own way and doing things our way that we didn't pay attention to the wisdom of the ones who had been there before us. It's so sad. I say pray for your grandson and give him time...he will someday realize how very blessed and fortunant he was to be raised by you. I'm sure he already knows that...he's just trying to act "grown-up" and "be the man", and really, we do want them to be responsible adults and parents. You've brought him up right...he just needs time to realize just how wonderful that is. Meanwhile, just continue to love them and pray for them, and enjoy the times you are able to be together.
My blog today is also about aging, Sandie. I guess great minds do think alike after all! It seems horrid to me that your grandson and his wife would have to sign that sort of paper before leaving the hospital; to me, that makes no sense but then again, there is a definite lack of common sense in today's world. I treasured every time I could babysit for my grands when they lived close by. Obviously, you were much more than a babysitter to your grandson. I'd feel hurt, too.
Blessings!
First of all you get a BIG HUG from me! ((((Sandie))))
Very good post about a subject we all relate to. I don't believe your grandson has rejected you - I think he's processing how he was raised and then how our culture thinks of baby boomers - although I wouldn't ever allow disrespect which I'm sure he wouldn't because he does love you. He's trying to figure it all out. That generation is so brainwashed.
That is so crazy about the hospital - my goodness as if we can't be trusted. I am reminded that each generation has had issues with their parents generation. It's normal but still hurtful and concerning.
Oh, I hear ya, dear friend.....every word. I laughed about the Progressive commercial, cause they too will someday be like their parents haha. I think that generation is trying to figure things out, and what works best for them. So, hang in there. Love those treasured pictures of you and him, and he looks happy. Now, you'll have to e-mail me and tell me about the signing of papers at the hospital, cause I just don't understand that. A big hug for you, Sandie, and know that you are loved here. : )
Even Shakespeare wrote about this special kind of hurt: "How sharper than a serpent's tooth it is / To have a thankless child!" - Spoken by King Lear
Sandie, I was shocked by that paper the hospital has new parents sign! I do hope you will scan that letter and post it here (leaving off any identifying information, of course). Or just type it out word-for-word. Had I been asked to sign such a paper before taking my baby home, I would have done some crossing out and rewording!
And there is such a lot of hype about the generations, trying to create battle lines in a totally unnecessary war! Of course, eventually the younger people will sooner or later be embarrassed by some of the assumptions they made when they were younger. There is *some* satisfaction in knowing that!
That's heartbreaking!
I cannot BELIEVE that the hospital said this about old people looking after babies!!! They are no more likely to shake or hurt babies than anyone else!!! Unless they had dementia, in which case no one would let them watch their babies anyway. I have seen all of these commercials and thought they were so funny! But you see a much sadder meaning, and now so do I. Asian people revere their elders and take care of them. We seem to be the opposite.
I can't believe that hospital forcing signatures about what to do and not do. I wouldn't sign that !!!
I also hate the progressive commercials. The subliminal message is horrible for our generation. The message is we don't know anything and we are stupid. I always wonder about the older man that always is correcting . Is he not Old???
Sandie, your post makes me sad. I guess I'm out of the current reality and don't understand the feelings of your grandson's opinions and his generation.
(((hugs)))
Sue
Hi dear friend, I love this post and all the photos and illustrations! I, like Ginny, cannot believe that the hospital said this about old people looking after babies!
For one thing, "old people" have more experience in life!!! And another thing, "young or younger" people can be even worse in that they lack the experience.
Anyone, young or old, can be a potential harm to a child...after all, there are violent people out there, unfortunately! Sheesh!
I don't think about age, as I find it is a number...I try to live in the moment, enjoying each day that God grants me. I am 69, and some days I feel older, some days younger.
Sending you much love and warm hugs, dear Sandie.
It's amazing those little whipper snappers are still alive. LOL I don't know of too many shakin babies or choking babies dying by older folks. You see the parents who are young making that mistake. Let's wait until they need live in a world without technology or a stocked grocery store for one reason or another. But let's hope that never happens or I'd miss reading everyones blogs or seeing family that live in a different state.
hugs
The media is extremely dangerous, which is why I avoid it. The internet is useful, and again dangerous as there is a lot of misinformation. As for all this generation twaddle, we are all humans, none are more valuable than the other, the younger generation lack common sense and the ability to think for themselves, because they are so addicted to technology and believe what is force fed to them. As for having a baby, humans have been doing that a very long time, if hospitals think parents need to be taught such basic care instructions, well I for one am extremely proud to be older.
Respect, in general seems to be in short supply. We need to respect everyone, regardless of their age, race, sex, national origin, etc.!
OH MY WORD. I am in shock over what they are telling new parent when they leave the hospital regarding older people. Do they not realize we are the people who raised the successfully to become responsible adults? That's definitely something to vent about.
I've noticed more and more how different the younger generation thinks. Their way of thinking seems so off to me.
Sweet entry. Yep, it is a different time. REading the things the kids with the new child had to read, is sorta chilling. Seems like it would promote a fear of letting a grandpa or Grandma keep the grand child for fear they might hurt the child. OUCH, If fact, we might love them to pieces. LOL
BUT YES! Sometimes attitudes are disheartening. WE have watched you from afar do the major raising of the dude, and you did a great job. BUT believe me, one day it will hit him like a ton of bricks, what you did for him and the family. WE have watched and admired how you did sacrifice everything including the mass of your time. Anyway, you are admired.. Love you lady I hope Atlanta is getting back to normal, we are warming up down here...
Sandie I am shocked that a hospital would do such a thing. I cannot imagine why anyone would come up with such an idea. You are so right...life here on planet earth is not what it used to be. I am so thankful that I got to grow up in the generation that knew how to spread their wings but still love and respect their parents and grandparents. Take care friend. Thanks for sharing...it makes us all feel not so alone in the same experiences. Hugs!
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