For 2018

"Life is lived forward, but understood backward. It is not until we are down the road and we stand on the mountain looking back through the valley that we can appreciate the terrain God has allowed us to scale.” Jill Savage

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

SEE THE ABILITY not the disability!

Okay I AM a STRONG advocate for children. Lots of reasons - mainly because I have devoted my life to them. I've raised two of my own, taught in the school system 13 years, and now helping raise my grandchild. In the school system I was a remedial aide about eight years, they did away with that position, and then worked special needs the other five. I think my favorite was remediation - these kids wanted so hard to be like everyone else - and just weren't quite there. I have to tell you - I've seen some of them as grown ups - and they are just fine. They are late bloomers - every read Leo the Late Bloomer?

Not all will make it to be without issues - but who does - don't we all have issues? Some with autism, aspersers dyslexia, sensory, ADHD, and many others will be adapting all their life. Some will adapt better then others and of course it does matter to what degree they have it, the help they receive, and the earliest intervention as possible. Special needs is an expensive issue.

I think to when you first find out - it feels like a bullet has been sent into your heart and you have a hole. But then you do what you have to do and learn to face it -then you move on to take it on and deal with it.

What is Sensory Processing Disorder? Ever read the book The Princess and the Pea? She sleeps on about 50 mattresses - one on top of the other - and still feels the pea underneath the bottom one. This is Lucy Jane Miller - this video shows SPD.

All children are artists. the problem is how to keep them that way when they grow up. Picasso

What is Dyslexia?
Dyslexia is a neurologically-based, often familial, disorder which interferes with the acquisition and processing of language. Varying in degrees of severity, it is manifested by difficulties in receptive and expressive language, including phonological processing, in reading, writing, spelling, handwriting, and sometimes in arithmetic.

Dyslexia is not the result of lack of motivation, sensory impairment, inadequate instructional or environmental opportunities, or other limiting conditions, but may occur together with these conditions.

Although dyslexia is lifelong, individuals with dyslexia frequently respond successfully to timely and appropriate intervention.

Speaking on behave of children today - remember - no abuse is acceptable and look whose birthday this is - a specialist on child abuse - have you ever read her book on The Drama of the Gifted Child (gifted does not mean smart in this case - means a 'gift' if you can learn to call it that.).

Happy Birthday Alice Miller - Wikipedia

Alice Miller is a psychologist and author, noted for her work on child abuse in its many forms, including physical abuse, emotional abuse and child sexual abuse. Miller studied and wrote about the effects of poisonous pedagogy upon children and lasting into adulthood, and the resulting effects on society as a whole.

Miller was born in Poland and in 1946 migrated to Switzerland. She gained her doctorate in philosophy, psychology and sociology in 1953 in Basel. She studied and practiced psychoanalysis for the next 20 years.

After 1973, she developed her own ideas about child development and psychology. She published her first three books in the late 1970s. In 1979, she stopped practicing as a psychoanalyst. She has continued to write and lecture on psychological issues.

A lot of information today - but it's important to me - my grandson has dyslexia, sensory, and ADHD! Our biggest sensory issue now is eating. When I tell people he is a poor eater - every one tells me that kids are just poor eaters, they had a poor eater, I should make him eat, I spoil him, they could make him eat - sorry, then you don't know oral sensory issues. HE CAN'T EAT! He must have separate plates, nothing can touch, nothing can be cooked differently, no black or green specks (like parsley when you go out), can't eat two foods together, eats one thing at a time, must be small bites with a small amount to start or it overwhelms him, they are only certain textures he can eat .... and the list goes on.

And I love every adorable part of him and he will grow up and he will be able to overcome these issues. He works hard.

PS- Having children is not for babies!
Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body."~Elizabeth Stone


5-6-7-8 Answer tomorrow.


Stella said...

Bless you for taking care of your grandson although I know it is a labor of love. Thanks educating the rest of us so we are more aware so we can have more compassion. Thanks for always coming by to visit. I always smile when I see you have been to vist as I do so enjoy each comment.

Marjorie (Molly) Smith said...

Sandie, thank you for this post, so many people do not understand, the problems that face these Children and not of their own making. I get so tired of hearing ignorant people saying, "well all that kid needs is a good butt whipping", "boy you can tell they aren't given any discipline at home" or "they are just to lazy to try", No these people don't have a clue of the pain and heartache these children go through. The self loathing and wondering "why can't I be like everyone else".
They need love and understanding, mingled with a little structure and being told it is alright to be different. You are your own special person,.
I know, we suffer the heart ache of her dispersal everyday. We never know what world she will wake up in and have to be there for her.
Have a good day my friend

Linda said...

Great post. My youngest daughter is a speech therapist and works with deaf and hard of hearing children. She has also worked with children with other kinds of disabilities. I marvel at her patience and love for these children. She gets such joy out of the smallest accomplishment and tells me, but Mama for these children that step is huge.

ClassyChassy said...

Very educational. The videos really showed and explained it very well. I can see why diagnosis is recommended, because the little boy seemed to be nothing but a little brat! And people watching him yell at his mom would definitely think so! But treatment for a disorder, and treatment for a 'brat' follow entirely different paths, so expert diagnosis is necessary! Thanks for a great post.

Angela said...

Hey Sandie!

Very informational today! I have learned a great deal from all of your posts since I started reading your blog!

I have heard of kids who don't like their food to touch but I never know that there would be some who need there food to be on different plates. I never gave it any thought that the different textures of food could be a problem either. Bless your heart for all that you are doing for your grandson. I'm sure that as he gets older he will be able to overcome these issues with food. He looks healthy so I'm sure that you are doing whatever it takes to get him what he needs!


Joyce said...

Wonderful informative post and I certainly enjoyed the quote at the end..yes your heart certainly goes outside your body:)

English Cottage in Georgia said...

What an inspired post. I have tears streaming down my face as you have touched so many issues of my daughter's diagnosis due to her myotonic muscular dystrophy. I recall several students who were falling through the cracks due to their having issues, but no diagnoses.

Sallie (FullTime-Life) said...

Good information. And I learned more about you today, my blogging friend.

Thank you for sharing your story and the information.

Your grandson is adorable and fortunate to have so much love in his life. You are right -- he WILL be fine!

Life is good! said...

what a wonderful grandma you are! i have a 19 yr. old daughter with learning disabilities, she's pretty high functioning but has ocd in some areas. what a wonderful blessing to have her in our family and i am sure you feel the same way about your grandson! lucky you and lucky him!!!!!

Tweedles -- that's me said...

Hey it's me Tweedles!
I hop, skipped, and jumped to you!
I think it takes "all kinds" to make the world go around", and love it the key to acceptance!

Terry said...

Howdy Sandie
You rock !!!!!!!
I have struggled with blogging becasue of my backward spelling :).
Disability no way !
Ability in a different way !
It was tough going through school in a rural area and moving around a lot in the early 60's .
In the first place I was first born a girl not a boy but My Dad insisted on Terry so I took home lots of notes about my name and the rest well it all kind of got jumbled up together over the years.
My Teachers passed me on to get rid of me .
It was as an Adult that I discovered I could learn :)
God Bless you Sandie !
Later on in life I even Home Schooled,had the joy of being a substitute Teacher ,Teachers Aide,Tutor ,and so on .
There is still so much for us all to learn about learning styles ,learning abilities are as different as people.
You are such a blessing.
You are a true Hero .
Thank you for being there to help others and for your precious grandson.
Big Texas Hugs
Happy Trails

{Bellamere Cottage} said...

Ahhhh.....Sandie....that was a great post. I must say, I'm sure not impressed with Nancy Snyderman, however. What a condescending attitude. Obviously she hasn't dealt with these kinds of issues before. I was uncomfortable with the way she talked to both sets of parents. I feel sad for these little ones who don't know what it's like to have a "normal" way of feeling and hearing. Poor little darlin's..... I think EVERY child is a blessing.......sometimes just in a different way. When you know what the obstacles are for them you realize how much harder everything is for them and really appreciate their progress and recognize their efforts, even when it's soooo hard for them. Bless your little fella. What lucky grandmas we are to have been so blessed.....aren't we!??

Big hugs to you Grandma....



Sandie...the only thing I can say after this post is I LOVE you girlfriend...this is WONDERFUL...thank you for this! To answer your school they taught us we have 5 senses...but I'm adding another as I sense YOU are a wonderful informed Grandma! LOVE IT!!!!!!