So, he ambled on over and kicked it clear across the river.
"What did you do that for?" Asked a passing giraffe.
"Because I recognized it as the same turtle that took a nip out of my trunk 53 years ago."
"Wow, what a memory" commented the giraffe.
"Yes," said the elephant, "turtle recall."
***********************
A woman was sitting at a bar enjoying an after work drink with her girlfriends when an exceptionally tall, handsome, extremely sexy, middle-aged man entered. He was so striking that the woman could not take her eyes off of him.
The young-at-heart man noticed her overly attentive stare and walked directly toward her. (As All men will.) Before she could offer her apologies for staring so rudely, he leaned over and whispered in her ear, 'I'll do anything, absolutely anything , that you want me to do, no
matter how kinky, for $20.00................on one condition.'
Flabbergasted, the woman asked what the condition was. The man replied, 'You have to tell me what you want me to do in just three words.'
The woman considered his proposition for a moment, and then slowly removed a $20 note from her purse, which she pressed into the man's hand along with her address.
She looked deeply into his eyes, and slowly and meaningfully said..............
'Clean my house.'
**********************
The Simson's Personality Test
http://www.blogthings.com/thesimpsonspersonalitytest/
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The Banana Test
There is a very, very tall coconut tree and there are 4 animals.
King Kong, an Ape, an Orangutan and a Monkey pass by.
They decide to compete to see who is the fastest to pick a banana off the tree.
Who do you guess will win?
Your answer will reflect your personality.
Think carefully . . . Try and answer within 30 seconds
Got your answer?
Now scroll down to see the analysis.
If your answer is:
Orangutan = you're dull & normal
Ape = you're a moron
Monkey = worse, you're an idiot
King Kong = you're hopelessly stupid
Why?????
A Coconut tree doesn't have bananas!
Obviously you're stressed and overworked. Take some time off and relax!
Love,
Chatty
PS Answer - how a woman's brain works of course!
4 comments:
The first thing that I thought of when seeing that diagram was that it looked like the inner workings of a colon! That's where a menopausal mind is these days I guess~
Good post, got a giggle, thank you very much!
I thought the diagram was something to do with a sewer!!!
Ha ha you have lots of good jokes up today!
First thing I DEMAND to know...is how did you get my photo to put on your blog...lol...and secondly I just found out I'm an idiot, yea that's right.... I picked the money...lol..boy I'm really feeling dumb now...ROTFLMBAO....
I picked Monkey, can't even get that right...I'm going to bed before I really mess up.
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