Smile at both the good and the not-so-good inside you. Embrace both. - Barbara Ann Kipfer
I wonder at times if some people don't believe this or misunderstand this quote.
I take it more therapeutically than anything else - probably because of my background.
I think it's very hard for a woman, or lets say Chatty, at times to like herself - to see the good in herself - that she has worth. It's so much easier to see the not so good in me and believe it more.
I had an abusive childhood which I have mentioned before. It's over - yet is it ever totally over? I made peace with my dad before he died and I loved him dearly - I don't think he did it on purpose to hurt me - I just think it was what it was. He hurt his first family, then he remarried and hurt his second - two generations of hurt and pain.
My point is not to discuss that just to give some history- to discuss the strength of women. My sister and I turned out to be so strong. We both love strongly. We're honest and open (okay sometimes too much). We're survivors. And I thank God for my (much) younger sister!!!!!!!!!!
So good things can come from bad things - you have to embrace and love the whole you. I spent years trying to learn to do that and I think for the most part I have - but you never can completely forget either, as much as you'd like too. A bit of it is always there with you - and that's the voice inside yourself telling you that you're bad. I've found when I fight it - it gets worse. So I do (try) to embrace it. Look at it. I'm not afraid of it anymore. It is a part of me and that's okay - there are a lot of good parts of me as well. I don't think you can possible have good without the bad or bad without the good. How would you know what they were without the opposite.
So what I am saying today - love all the parts of yourself. Embrace yourself.
So Chatty being honest today. I'm not saying abuse it okay. Abuse of any sort is NOT okay. Words hurt as much as a physical slap.
Happy Birthday to a strong woman: (wikipedaia)
Golda Meir known as Golda Meyerson from 1917–56) was the fourth Prime Minister of the State of Israel.
Meir was elected Prime Minister of Israel on 17 March 1969, after serving as Minister of Labour and Foreign Minister. Israel's first and the world's third female to hold such an office, she was described as the "Iron Lady" of Israeli politics years before the epithet became associated with British prime minister Margaret Thatcher. Former prime minister David Ben-Gurion used to call Meir "the best man in the government"; she was often portrayed as the "strong-willed, straight-talking, grey-bunned grandmother of the Jewish people".
Did you know that she was born and educated in the United States and that she left here to live in Palestine?
18 comments:
You speak the truth my dear! I should take those words to heart for sure!
HI Sandie....Good, thought-provoking post. I think MOST of us come from some kind of dysfunction. If you meet the FUNCTIONAL family, let me know. I want to meet them. Ha!
You are a kind, thoughtful, compassionate and friendly person. And those count!
Take care and come to visit! Sincerely, Susan
Bless you, my friend! Life is quite the journey of learning, isn't it?
I admire your honesty and thought provoking posts so much. You have such insight into your self and I know you have worked hard to get there. You are such a special person! I can not find the words to tell you how much you mean to me!
Hugs!
Linda
A wonderful message. Being open and honest is not always easy but forgiving is one of the most difficult tasks of all.
Thank you for sharing.
Good Morning Sandie....my husband comes from a very abusive childhood both verbally and phyically....to this day even at 89 my FIL is the meanest man I know and my husband is bothered by his words...it's nice that you were able to forgive your father.....
wonderful post. i came from an amazing family and i admire the strength of women who don't and how they rise above what their former circumstance was. good for you!
Lpost and so much truth to that quote! Thanks for sharing!
Wonderful post!!
I think we all have something inside that bothers us, whether something out of our control, perceived by others as something we should be able to control or sometimes a vague feeling that we aren't all we should be.
The simplest advice can be the most difficult to follow. We should be as nice to ourselves as we would be toward a loving friend that we admire. We wouldn't cut them down but always are ready to build them up.
And about that honesty....did you really think those shoes you are wearing today go with that outfit?
(snicker, snicker! :D )
To answer you question from by blog about the nun wearing pink, she was a young nun who was one of the early ones to dress in street clothes rather than traditional habit. We lost touch a few years after our wedding and I don't know if she remained in her order.
All I can say to this post is, "Oh, chatty, I'm so sorry." Love J
OH goodness. Another thing that you and I have in common. One thing I always said that I might not have survived the tough years after my divorce if my Dad hadn't always kicked my ass all those years. Now...he is a sweet heart. Usually. Still has a little temper. BUT, so much happier and nicer since retiring and quitting drinking! Alcohol so destroys! (I drink, but am not an alcoholic like Dad was...)I'm glad that everything is good now. We have good talks on the phone. Before, I always wondered how I would resolve things if he died when things were awful. I guess his Dad was even worse and my cousins Dads were mean, too.
But, I'm o.k. love, Cheryl
Embrace, Sister! Embrace! You are exquisitely made.
What a powerful post! Didn't know you went through all that. My hubby also had an abusive childhood, but he also made peace with his mother and understood it wasn't really her, it was the way she was raised. The best is to truly forgive and understand.
Enjoy your day!
I'm sorry about your past, Sandie; but I'm glad you were able to make peace with your dad before his death. I'm sorry it was abusive, I'm sure a lot of it had to do with the way he was raised. We, as you know, tend to raise like our parents did (unless we really work hard at breaking those chains) and sometimes we promise ourselves we aren't going to be like our mom or dad but find ourselves doing just the same things because that's all we know. But regardless, it is unfortunate it happened in your household and it affected you and affects you. This past weekend at church the pastor was talking about words and he said it takes at least 10 affirming comments to make up for one hurtful phase. So there is lots of hurt in words used. I think you are doing the best to work with what you have to work with, with the memories you brought with you from childhood and the life you are living right now. But I'm hoping that you don't think you are bad because of the abuse you suffered. Because you know it was not your fault in any way.
betty
I agree with Susan!
Your post was great....I appreciate that you understand, know yourself,and have made peace regardless of past influences.
I always like to think that we need to head toward the "light" in our lives and keep the darkness in it's place.
HI!!!!
I so love that youa re so open and honest, that is the BEST QUALITY some one can have, be honest, first with yourself!!!
You are a survivor and a GREAT person --past are your past, we must leave it behind, learn form it and move on, YOU ARE who you are becasue of the past.
GOd LOVES YOU!!!!! SO MUCH!!!
AS we all do!!!!
hugs,
jamie
You have proven yourself to be a survivor.
You chose to be.
I admire that.
Your one tough cookie who has the guts to speak out and the drive to move past it.
You are a survivor
love
tweedles
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