"Life is lived forward, but understood backward. It is not until we are down the road and we stand on the mountain looking back through the valley that we can appreciate the terrain God has allowed us to scale.” Jill Savage

Friday, August 02, 2013

Fun Friday With A little Help With My Friends and Feline Friday




"Am I fast enough to get past him?"



















I rear-ended a car this morning...the start of a REALLY bad day!

The driver got out of the other car, and he was a DWARF!!
He looked up at me and said 'I am NOT Happy!'
So I said, 'Well, which one ARE you then?'

That's how the fight started.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
My wife was standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror.

She was not happy with what she saw and said to me, "I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment.'

I replied, "Your eyesight's damn near perfect."

And then the fight started........

After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security.  The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's License to verify my age.  I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home.  I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later.


The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'.

So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair.

She said, 'That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me', and she processed my Social Security application.

When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office.

She said, 'You should have dropped your pants.  You might have gotten disability too.'

And then the fight started...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary.  She said, "I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in about 3 seconds."


I bought her a bathroom scale.

And then the fight started......

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My wife and I were sitting at a table at her high school reunion, and she kept staring at a drunken man swigging his drink as he sat alone at a nearby table.

I asked her, "Do you know him?"

"Yes", she sighed, "He's my old boyfriend. I understand he took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear he hasn't been sober since."

"My God!" I said, "Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?"

And then the fight started...


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I took my wife to a restaurant.

The waiter, for some reason, took my order first.

"I'll have the rump steak, rare, please."

He said, "Aren't you worried about the mad cow?"



"Nah, she can order for herself."

And that's when the fight started.....

Thank you Sharon!



More animals in Mexico!




This is so cute - it's a baby elephant getting it's first mud bath - kind of looks like fun.  Hey would you do a mud bath?  I think I would if someone would do it with me!

h ttp://www.youtube.com/embed/bu_E2f0mQmI?rel=0

Ann from The Boston Lady


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THE LAUGH:




THE LIFT:

“For it is in giving that we receive.”
(Saint Francis of Assisi) 

66 comments:

Jemma@athomewithjemma said...

Good Morning and Happy Friday-
What a great mix of delightful humor!
Love the cat and the naked man! LOL!
Happy Hugs my friend~
Jemma

MadSnapper said...

I can't see to type for the tears running down my face, i read all the then the fight started jokes to bob and we have laughed until our sides hurt.

Jill said...

Oh my word! I love, love all of these and am giggling to high heaven. Thank you, dear friend.

Happy Friday to YOU~!

I'm mostly known as 'MA' said...

Thanks for all the smiles today. Hope you have a fantastic Friday!

Cheri said...

These were really good today Sandie. Each of those comics made me think of myself and I laughed. Then I got to the "then the fight started" and laughed some more. Thanks.

Rae said...

Loved them. Great way to start the weekend. I am still smiling.

Unknown said...

Good jokes to start the day. Hope your Friday is a good one!

Nikki (Sarah) said...

I love these!!!! Especially and that's when the fight started jokes. I got to share those. Too funny. Thanks funny girl for starting my day off with a smile. Sending you tons of hugs.

Jeanie said...

Happy Friday, Sandie.
I want that dryer!

Susan said...

ha ha ha haha The Social Security disability joke really cracked me up. All of them gave a chuckle.

Have a nice Friday, Sandie. Susan

Elizabeth Edwards said...

i love the naked man comic - that is too funny!! ( :

thanks, for the laughs. enjoy your weekend.

Preppy Empty Nester said...

Love all the "then the fight started" jokes. Also the shower in the middle of the day - I can identify! Have a great weekend!

Denise said...

Can always depend on you to make me laugh, thanks my friend.

valerietilsten59.blogspot.com said...

Dearest Sandie,
This is one of your best.. although they are all good.
I am aching all over from laughing.. all absolutely fantastic..
I had a shower the other day and thought. oh..what the .....and put my pj back on.
that would be me in the scale or the mirror.. very very happy funny hillarious..
loved it..
Thanks sandie.. wishing you a blessed weekend.
You brightened my day. xxx love val

Unknown said...

Thank you for the giggles today :-) Hope you'll have a fantastic day my friend...hugs x

Shelly said...

These were so funny- the one with the vultures really made me laugh!

ruthie said...

Love the "fur"niture! My black dog leaves fur in every inch of my house! Have a good day!

Terri D said...

So many good chuckles, and a couple more great photos of Andy! The birds are amazingly beautiful and he must have had a blast in Mexico!

Sandee said...

What a fun post this is. Love it. I would love to go into the dryer and come out wrinkle free. Yes I would.

Have a terrific Feline Friday honey. Big hugs. :)

Susan J. Reinhardt said...

I needed a good laugh today! Thanks, Sandie.

Lucy said...

Your blog is so much fun. I liked the naked man also but I hope Joe never gets that forgetful. On second thought Me either.

TexWisGirl said...

loved all the 'fight' ones. :)

renae said...

Oh Sandie, so fun. I laughed and laughed at all "and then the fight started" ones.

Baby Elephant was so cute. I loved it ALL!

Have a great WEEKEND!

Miss Debbie said...

Thanks for the laughs...those "that's when the fight started" stories were great!!

jack69 said...

Laughed most of the way thru. good for the health I hear. ha!
Funny about the 'free time' or forgetting something. And I laughed out loud at the stepping into a dryer anc coming out wrinkle free.

NEVER saw the FURniture line before!
Thanks for a laugh amid confuser problems. hahaha He said two restores later...

~Lavender Dreamer~ said...

Always a good way to spend a little time on Friday...having a few laughs! Thanks my friend! The 'that's how the fight started' has been a fav of mine, too!

Ms. A said...

I wish that dryer thing would work, too... I'd toss me in!

Betty Manousos said...

you are amazing!

liked the first quote...so true!

thanks for the good laugh.
happy weekend~
:))

Sharon said...

Oh Sandie! I am cracking up! My absolute favorite part of this post was the "and then the fight started" stories. Oh my goodness...soooo funny! My favorite one? The one about the dwarf. Back in the day my nickname was Grumpy - must have been the menopause. Now? It's more likely to be Sleepy.

Would I do a mudbath? Probably not. I'd be afraid of getting mud into all the *crevices*...

xo

The Boston Lady said...

And then the fight started... LOL. Loved them all! And the quote by Francis which I believe is exactly what the new pope would say. So glad you ran the little elephant video, and thanks for the shout out! Ann

Lynn said...

Enjoyed the 'and then the fight started' jokes! Happy weekend:@)

Betsy Banks Adams said...

Cute Sandie... My fav's today are the "And then the fight began..." ones... SO CUTE.... Loved the one about the man who showed his silver chest hair!!!!!!

Wish we could get in the dryer and get rid of our wrinkles... ha ha

Hugs,
Betsy

Anonymous said...

great post! you always make me smile!

Theresa Mahoney said...

And that's how the fight started! Oh, how fun! Great way to start the weekend- with a big smile!

Ginny Hartzler said...

All of your cartoons and jokes today seem better and funnier than usual!! So funny!!! And the birds picture, he must have been in heaven! Hoping you have a great weekend!

Marie said...

Hubby and I have tears from laughter! The fight jokes are so FUNNY!
The lift is so true for me. :)
hugs,
Marie

Debby@Just Breathe said...

That is pretty much me on the PJ joke. I do ask myself that question often. Yes it would be nice if we could jump into the dryer and get those results. Thanks for the laughs.
Enjoy your weekend, Debby

Anonymous said...

:)) Thank you for sharing, great post. happy week-end!

NanaDiana said...

Happy Friday- I sure got a few laughs here- Love the "that's how the fight started" jokes. xo Diana

Dee said...

Love all the age comics. They all sadly have truth to them...one thing about us wise and wonderful's...we have humor. Just want to let you know Lucy got her chewy's today. New treats and a box to play in makes for a happy cat :)

Coloring Outside the Lines said...

Happy Friday to you Sandie- hope you have a wonderful weekend!

barbara woods said...

great one sandie

Ann said...

Oh these were good ones. Thanks for the laughs. Love hearing the "how the fight started" ones

Jo-Anne's Ramblings said...

Thank you I needed a laugh this afternoon

Unknown said...

your grandson is a brave guy...first the iguanas and now the parrots...most people are so afraid of getting bitten by the cannopeners they have on their faces! He looks utterly ecstatic!

Anonymous said...

These were great...all of them. Thanks. I needed this! Hugs!

MunirGhiasuddin said...

Those are some really funny "Then the fight started Jokes"
Have a great weekend:)

Linda @ A La Carte said...

Oh my goodness....and then the fight started! these cracked me up!
hugs,
Linda

Savannah Granny said...

Hi Sandi, I loved the fight jokes and the cartoon about the mid day bath fits me on more days than I would like to admit. Have a great Saturday.

ADesign said...

Nice :)
Would you like to follow each other via GFC and Bloglovin?
Let me know :)

Kisses!

http://www.gagcloud.com/

Kay G. said...

Finally made it to Kennesaw on Wednesday. Wow, it feels like it is on the other side of the world, driving through Atlanta! Maybe I could meet up with you if I am ever back in that part of the world again? xx

Abelle | The Wows! And Oops! Of Life said...

Hello there, Sandie!

These are funny! But you know, I am touched with the quotes I found below. Just when I needed them.

Happy blogging to us! ;o)

mail4rosey said...

LOL at 'then the fight started!' And the buzzards made my jaw drop (and I laughed). A bunch of good ones, like always. :) Happy weekend to ya!

Josie Two Shoes said...

This whole post was fun from top to bottom, lots of great smiles, old and new! Thanks for the day brightener. And yes, I bet that kitty up top can zoom by that big dog and head for the nearest high spot before he is up and running! Sometimes in life you just have to go for it!

Paula said...

Always love the old age jokes because I'm there so we have to laugh to keep from crying. I am feeling pretty comfortable in my own skin these days though. At least for now. ha ha

Josie Two Shoes said...

I'm back! I read your profile and then started reading down your sidebar, and loved every single quote I found there. I love good quotes... paste them all over my Facebook page, which could more readily be named "Cats and Quotes". :-) I see we are at the same "young of heart" stage in life, and I'll definitely be back for more good reading! <3

Debbie-Dabble Blog and A Debbie-Dabble Christmas said...

You always make me laugh , Sandie!!

Thanks so much for always stopping by!!

Hugs,
Debbie

Catherine said...

Gosh! I painted right through Friday - it's Saturday night already! LOL!
Hope you have having a terrific weekend!
xo Catherine

Starry Dawn said...

Hi Sandie,
You always bright up my days with a smile. I love the picture of your grandson in Mexico with beautiful and colourful parrots.
They are amazing birds, and they talk too...
Have a great weekend Sandie,family and loved ones!God bless.
Starry.

Susannah said...

Hilarious! I loved - "then the fight started"! Gotta take a break now....you got me overwrought with laughter!!!!

Another great and fantastic post!

Susannah

Susannah said...
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Susannah said...
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Cheryl @ TFD said...

I love the fight jokes. I laughed until I cried! And the kitty and the FURniture is so true!
Hope you're having a nice weekend!

Diana said...

Hey
I am back!! Have had a really bust 2 weeks. I will write you about it all. LOved the shower in the middle of the day and I say Go for the jammies!! LOL

Diana

Mevely317 said...

Love how you always manage to push my "smile" button, Sandie!
That one about putting on PJ's sure hit home. I'd LIVE in my "jammies" if I could!

Have yourselves a blessed day!

Eat To Live said...

Hope you had a GREAT Friday Sandie. We went away for the weekend and I just got back a little while ago. There is No Place Like Home.