"Life is lived forward, but understood backward. It is not until we are down the road and we stand on the mountain looking back through the valley that we can appreciate the terrain God has allowed us to scale.” Jill Savage

Wednesday, May 05, 2010

Happiness - crazy or creative? Part 1

Crazy or . . .



Creative?



Yesterday my grandson asked me to come to school and have lunch. They get to invite someone to sit with them and we get to sit at a special table. I have to be honest. When ever I go into school - and this was true for my children too - and have lunch -my kids act so silly. It drives me nuts. Plus my GS doesn't eat - the cafeteria is too noisy and it bothers his sensory issues and he just CAN'T eat - and while I know it is a CAN'T thing it drives me crazy too! So why do I put myself out? Because I love him and that is what you do when you love someone - you deny your needs and comfort (not always) for theirs.

Now the school nurse called me and told me his Benedryl there at school was on the recall list. So on my way to lunch I stopped by the store. When in line I wasn't paying much attention and all of a sudden I felt some wettish warmth on my arm - like someone breathing on me. I turned around and there was a little blind guy as cute as can be - smelling me (hope I smelled good).

Gosh my heart went out to him and his dad. And I stopped and thanked God for what I had. I am so lucky and so blessed. Now this is the truly gift he gave me - when he and his father were done - he went with his dad just skipping away - with his blind pole - as happy as can be. He didn't know to be unhappy! God Wink

Later in this day - I received this God Wink in the mail - "To be without some of the things you want is an indispensable part of happiness." - Bertrand Russell

Got to school and had lunch with the GS. He pulled his best buddy and yes - he acted goofy - and he didn't couldn't eat much, but I nagged him a bit. Told him is he wanted me at lunch he had to take a little loving nagging.

Then - the worst happened - he asked me to stay for recess - right after lunch.

I did NOT want too. But he held my hand and asked me again - and what could this grandma do but say yes? So I stayed yet another 45 minutes outside trading 'Silly Bandz'. He stayed right next to me the whole time - and even gave me a hug. So I was thrilled - how much longer at age 9 will he do that? Right?

Now one little girl - who I know - asked if my GS lived with us. I said yes and his mom. She said just like so-n-so and I said yes - and don't you - and she said yes, with my grandma, not my mom or dad. Okay - my heart goes out to this little one too. Little children who should be free of burdens - have more burdens then you can imagine. Her teacher - my GS's ex teacher - won't let them bring these Silly Bandz to school (GS can only bring them out at recess). Her grandma works in the cafeteria and she asked me if I would let my grandson come after school and trade with her in the cafeteria.

That meant I had to pick the GS up at carpool and drive to the front of the school and park- go in to the cafeteria - and let them bargain and trade 4 - am I crazy? I do have a hard time saying no.

So I said yes. And the little girl gave me the biggest hug. She was so thrilled. And even though there was some mighty tough negotiations going on after school, I did it anyway.

Silly Bandz are nothing but rubber bands that are in different shapes!

Silly Bandz-


Okay - now my GS is an only child - and a good one - even though he has no clue how to share - a skill that must be taught. Now he has an OCD grandma who likes silly bandz as much as he does - coupled with the fact I love him - so I have ordered them off the Internet everywhere. He has a lot and I mean a lot. He has the most actually. Now I am a sharer so I thought it would be a good thing - he could keep a full set of one and trade and 'give' some to others.

Was I mistaken - he is one tough little negotiator. We had a few little squabbles at recess and at the after school negations. I got him to give (and it was HARD) - just give 7 away - free. 4 to his best friend who had none. Three to this little girl after school. I am such a wimp anyway.

We had a little discussion on the way home and I told him that 'to whom much is given much is expected'. And that he was a lucky boy and had oodles to share and that he should share - and blah, blah, blah. That the ones who had none couldn't trade and the ones that have 50 like this little girl - didn't have and duplicates and that each one she gave away was a tough decision.

Man this was a complicated day and it was not done yet. Part two tomorrow.

A view into the life of crazy (?)Chatty Crone



Happy Birthday Nellie Bly - Wikipedia

Ten Days in a Mad-House

Burdened again with theater and arts reporting, Bly left the Pittsburgh Dispatch in 1887 for New York City. Penniless after four months, she talked her way into the offices of Joseph Pulitzer's newspaper, the New York World, and took an undercover assignment for which she agreed to feign insanity to investigate reports of brutality and neglect at the Women's Lunatic Asylum on Blackwell's Island.

After a night of practicing deranged expressions in front of a mirror, she checked into a working-class boardinghouse. She refused to go to bed, telling the boarders that she was afraid of them and that they looked crazy. They soon decided that she was crazy, and the next morning summoned the police. Taken to a courtroom, she pretended to have amnesia. The judge concluded she had been drugged.

She was then examined by several doctors, who all declared her to be insane. "Positively demented," said one, "I consider it a hopeless case. She needs to be put where someone will take care of her." The head of the insane pavilion at Bellevue Hospital pronounced her "undoubtedly insane". The case of the "pretty crazy girl" attracted media attention: "Who Is This Insane Girl?" asked the New York Sun. The New York Times wrote of the "mysterious waif" with the "wild, hunted look in her eyes", and her desperate cry: "I can't remember I can't remember."

Committed to the asylum, Bly experienced its conditions firsthand. The food consisted of gruel broth, spoiled beef, bread that was little more than dried dough, and dirty undrinkable water. The dangerous inmates were tied together with ropes. The inmates were made to sit for much of each day on hard benches with scant protection from the cold. Waste was all around the eating places. Rats crawled all around the hospital. The bathwater was frigid, and buckets of it were poured over their heads. The nurses were obnoxious and abusive, telling the patients to shut up, and beating them if they did not. Speaking with her fellow residents, Bly was convinced that some were as sane as she was. On the effect of her experiences, she wrote:

"What, excepting torture, would produce insanity quicker than this treatment? Here is a class of women sent to be cured. I would like the expert physicians who are condemning me for my action, which has proven their ability, to take a perfectly sane and healthy woman, shut her up and make her sit from 6 a.m. until 8 p.m. on straight-back benches, do not allow her to talk or move during these hours, give her no reading and let her know nothing of the world or its doings, give her bad food and harsh treatment, and see how long it will take to make her insane. Two months would make her a mental and physical wreck."

"...My teeth chattered and my limbs were ...numb with cold. Suddenly, I got three buckets of ice-cold water...one in my eyes, nose and mouth."

After ten days, Bly was released from the asylum at The World's behest. Her report, later published in book form as Ten Days in a Mad-House, caused a sensation and brought her lasting fame. While embarrassed physicians and staff fumbled to explain how so many professionals had been fooled, a grand jury launched its own investigation into conditions at the asylum, inviting Bly to assist. The jury's report recommended the changes she had proposed, and its call for increased funds for care of the insane prompted an $850,000 increase in the budget of the Department of Public Charities and Corrections. They also made sure that all of the examinations were more thorough so that only people who were actually insane went to the asylum.

Thank you Nellie Bly

Think BIG. There are unseen forces ready to support your dreams.- Cheryl Richardson

20 comments:

Love Of Quilts said...

We all are helpless to say no when it comes to those grandchildren. Bless Nellie Bly for her courage.Trish

Unknown said...

to bad you didn't get to tetter totter or swing. do they even have those at school playgrounds anymore? what a wonderful grandma you are. lucky lucky grandson!

Susan said...

Wow, Sandie. I learn a lot from your blog. I was clueless as to the rubber bands in different shapes. Also didn't know Nelly Blye did that investigation. How brave she was. Take care, Sandie! Have a wonderful afternoon! Sincerely, Susan

From the Kitchen said...

How could I resist a blog entitled the "Chatty Crone"? What a delight to be able to spend so much time with a grandchild. Love those rubber bands. It's great when something so utilitarian can be interesting as well. I also enjoyed reading about Nelly Bly. I had no idea!

Best,
Bonnie

Linda @ A La Carte said...

You have the most interesting adventures with GS!! I think it's wonderful how you give so much of yourself to him! He is a lucky guy!

Melanie said...

You're so funny, Sandie!!
I'm glad you were able to spend some time with your grandson. Yes, it's amazing what we will do for our kids!! Hope he got something out of the 'sharing talk'.
Looking forward to part two! :)

Mollye said...

Aw you warm my heart with your granny stories. You are one very special grandma and he is such a lucky little guy.

About the little blind boy remindes me to of my son Lance's 14 year old step-sons who are both blind. What a challenge but what a blessing. Their mom is an amazing woman like you!

Angela said...

You sure have been busy today Sandie! I didn't like eating lunch at school either. Our school only invites us once a year and it is pretty crowded and they rush you.

I've never seen the rubber band things. I think that is what my daughter was asking me for yesterday so they must be just starting to hit my area now! She said they were a dollar at a store in the mall. I don't shop at the mall anymore!

Hope you get some rest tonight!
Angela

ClassyChassy said...

Wow - never heard of shaped rubber bands - the things we don't learn at your blog!!! Interesting too, about Nelly Blye.

^..^Corgidogmama said...

Hi kiddo, always love reading your bios. They are always of people that we don't normally ever think of!
Your GS is the luckiest, most loved little boy on the planet!
You two will have so many memories to savor in future days when he's taller than you!

Jojo said...

You are one great grandmother.

Nezzy (Cow Patty Surprise) said...

You are a wonderful Grandma. It's your job not to say no. Look at all ya experienced by sayin' yes to the little fella. My twelve year old Grandson still sits on my lap.....we're gonna have to trade places. Heeehehehe!!!

Whosyergurl said...

Aren't you glad he didn't ask you to play volleyball? I think he sounds adorable and you are a wonderful, wonderful grandma!
xo, Cheryl

Annesphamily said...

This was such a wonderful post! Sandie I always enjoy stopping by your place! I hope you have a wonderful evening! Blessings to you and yours! Anne

Buttercup said...

I had no clue about the rubber bands.
Thanks. You are a great grandma and so blessed to have a sweet hugging grandson.

betty said...

never heard of those Silly Bandz, but it seems like there is always something going around the schools for sharing and trading; I remember with my son it was Pokemon cards years ago. I think it is a great lesson and harmless to learn negotiations as well as sharing indeed

what a sweet grandma you are to go and spend time with him like this; and you are right, the days will come when he won't be asking. I used to always play with my kids when they asked (provided I could schedule wise) because I knew they would grow and stop asking for this or that play (and indeed they did)

looking forward to part two :) (as long as it doesn't come when I'm on vacation :)

betty

Mimi said...

HI!!!
See I learn so much by reading blogs!!!!I had never heard of silly bandz!!!!Never, how cool they are though!!!!So important to teach young ones to share!!!!
I have to rmind my self, Camdyn must learn to share, even with MIMI, she will learn, she is only --near 2
ok, how sweet of you Grandma to hang out at shcool with Darling GS
it must have meant so much to him!!!!
What a Great one you are,
it is OK to say YES to them,
but you and I must practice saying NO!!!!!
Hugs,
jamie

Tanna said...

I hope you will always say YES! LOL. (though there are some times no is a good thing) Yes to loving and being there for not only your GS, but others who need that love, too. Hats off to you Chatty!

Knitty said...

Awww, I hope Colton will invite me to his school one day. After posing him yesterday, I may be in trouble though. Surely a school aged child won't carry a grudge from when he was 8 weeks old, will he? LOL!

ocmist said...

You have truly outdone yourself with sharing this time! There is SO MUCH of God in this post... Christ is the example of what we should be... a servant, and you have shown yourself to be a true daughter. You've taken the time to give of yourself to each of these children that you talked about in the ways that they needed to feel loved. You've shown by example the need to share even if you didn't feel like sharing and that is such an important lesson for your GS.

I've heard the name of Nellie Bly, but never new anything about her story. THAT is AWESOME! I will have to see if I can find her book. I like to read books about people who have "lived in other's shoes." One of my favorites that I read many years ago was titled, "Black Like Me," and it was about a reporter that used stuff to make himself black, and lived that way for several months... VERY ILLUMINATING!!!