Love-Jennifer Nettles

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nVa4Luyj0Qw&feature=email

I love Jennifer Nettles. Did you know she's from Atlanta? I think she's a woman who gets life.

Of course I'm thinking about love these days with my daughter's upcoming wedding. The little bickering and little problems seem to be coming out now. Remember the stress of planning a wedding? Sometimes you wonder if you should have just run off and eloped!

I'm thinking about young love and the wonderment of it. Will it last for them? (I hope and pray so). What can they do from the very beginning to ensure love will last? Sometimes I feel couples should spend a year in therapy before they get married - a requirement for getting the license.

Marriage isn't for sissies.

It's hard work. Compromise. Giving 110%. Giving in when you don't feel like it.

Do people think when they get married that the work is over once the wooing is over? That they can slide? That it's not necessary to woo anymore? That the courtship is over and they don't have to work anymore? That the flirting is over and the dating. That the romance is over. In other words - once you get married(you've reached the goal) that you're done with the hard work and you can just stop trying?

Jokes on them - it's only truly just begun and if you're aren't man or woman enough to keep on working - don't bother getting married because you won't be married for long - at least not happily. Marriage is work and yes it has it's benefits and great rewards - you just have to decide if it's worth the work.

When is a marriage not a good thing? What if one person tends to be the giver and the other person the taker? How long can that keep up in a relationship?

I remember in the movie 'Wedding Wars'. A cute, girlie, romantic movie - but with a message. One girl was marrying a man who loved her (her essence) - just the way she was - flaws and all. He could accept her and her antics and it endeared her to him. The other girl was marrying someone who didn't like who she had become - he wanted her to change back to the girl she used to be.

Now the problem was that this girl was a door mat for others. The 'nice' girl. The girl who gave up what she wanted so others could have what they wanted. Then one day she got frustrated and snap - she started to change - she started to find and take care of herself. Well, her fiance was mad at her for changing - he wanted the girl he fell in love with ten years ago. He wanted to control his wife to be. He wanted her to promise to go back to the way she was. But alas she could not, would not. It was more painful to stay like she was than to change. One ended up married and one didn't. I guess the other girl found she had to be more giving, but the changed was not nearly so drastic as the other one.

People change! How in the world does a marriage survive change? What if one person changes and not the other? The result would be that of a marriage of 'fighting or caving' (giving up who you are)? Is that love? Was it wrong for this girl to find herself and change? Should a person not change? That wouldn't be loving towards yourself.

Love requires not only darn hard work - it requires an open heart and mind - an open soul. You hold, but not too tight. You let go, but not too far.

Love is good, and love is hard.

Chatty
Hear her song below - so what is love anyway?

A Happy Ending - Sugarland

Okay, okay - I've got to talk some about weddings. We have one coming in four months. A big white (ivory) wedding. If you didn't think a full formal wedding could be planned in six months - you don't know my resourceful daughter. I think it's all coming together beautifully.

I think what the song is trying to say, to me, is that again a happy ending is a choice. And not just one choice. It's a choice every time you make a decision - in marriage and in life. I believe that in my core! If you see someone happy or unhappy - it usually is a choice. Not always, but many times it is.


"A Happy Ending" by Sugarland - see the YouTube Below.

Cowboys ride into sunsets
The good guy always gets the girl
Cinderella's just fit
The glass slipper that changed her world
We all know the stories
We all know the fairy tales
We all get the glory
Of making it for ourselves

Chorus:
From the beginning
We're all looking for a happy ending
Every dream of winning
Every love we've been in
Right from the beginning
We're looking for a happy ending

We come here with nothing
And take it with us the day we leave
The first and last breath don't matter
It's all the ones that are in between
It's the reason for living
It's the reason the caged bird sings
It's why we sit in the movies
All the way to the closing scene

And for all the dreamers who have come and gone
Who have reached for the stars who have overcome
You're the hope, you're the wish, you're the truth
Baby here's the proof
Baby's born in the ghetto
Baby's born with a silver spoon
One tells his mama, "I'll have a dream."
One tells his mama, "I'll walk the moon."

My wish for you my dear daughter, is that you will choose to have a happy ending. To do that I think you both must work hard and sacrifice. But most of all - don't forget to choose to have some fun. Life doesn't have to be made harder than it is - hard times will come on their own. Slow down and smell the roses.

She is picking out songs for her wedding now - it's been a lot of fun - if you have any suggestions - let me know.

Love,
Chatty